Happiness tied to contact
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Happiness tied to contact
| Tue, 04-13-2004 - 10:50pm |
Don't you just hate how your mood is tied to how much contact you have with MM?
When we are together, when we talk, when he messages me, I get happy, like nothing could stop me.
But then when those times go by where we don't talk, when I am sitting on my hands, I feel so sad.
And I'm lucky. I usually receive some sort of contact every day, despite MM having a very hectic schedule.
Sigh.

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Life was so much easier before this! I'm starting to ask myself if it's worth the additional emotional turmoil!
I really feel for you. Sat at work, in tears because of lack of contact. BTDT too many times - and not so very long ago either. About 10 days ago in fact! I think my happiness levels are totally effected by contact with MM. He brightens my day, makes me feel so wonderful, unlike anyone else. Plus when we're in touch, I know I am still special to him. But when the NC kicks in, I am depressed, shaken, frustrated, start to question everything and over-think. I have been with MM for 3 years - we have been through all kinds of ups and downs and still survived. Yet after all this time, when the NC arrives, it effects me as badly as it did on Day 1. Maybe this is part of the price, the bargain ... they make us feel like teenagers, like we are young again, take us to the highest highs. But with that also comes the lowest lows. But to understand it doesn't make it any easier, does it?
Hang in there girl. Only you know what's right for you - in your heart. I know it's awkward because you see him every day at work, but try and stay busy. It's so easy to say that, I know, and so hard to do. But honestly, it really is just about all you can do.
Big HUG!!
Neuro xx
GB2
Now that I'm experiencing the first NC period, whew...I'm really noticing my moods have definitely been impacted and I'm sure others have too. It's like going from Jr. High School giddiness to Adult-hood Blahs. I miss MM too - even if he is just in a meeting and 'away.'
But come monday morning, when I log on and see, "Good morning! I missed you over the weekend!" It makes me SO happy!
Crazy!
I am new here but I totally agree. My MM lives 5 minutes away, our sons are best friends, and we work for the same company, although he is in a different area than me now. I saw him last Tuesday AND the Friday before so maybe I was spoiled for a while there but I haven't been able to see him since. We spoke on the phone because my son spent Thurs and Fri nights at his house. Those convo's had sexy undertones but that is all I've had from him despite leaving a voicemail yesterday morning on his cell. Last Wednesday I was happy, today I am depressed and getting worse as time goes by without a word from him. We dont' email (too risky his email goes to work and home)don't leave sexy voicemail (once mine was intercepted by another co worker) so the only contact we have is the cell when we can talk. It would be nice to get an email from him saying he missed me! He won't leave any text or voicemail either for fear of it being seen.
Sigh, I won't call him either now, I have to have SOME power!
DeeDee
see eath other when we can, if I do not receive one I am sad
the whole day. He comsumes me. I get happy, mad, frustrated,
then I hear from him, and I am another person.
I wish this passion, lust, or whatever this is that is
happening to me would just leave..but then I do not want
it to leave. I am so confused, just as you seem to be.
All my support, we all need each other...after all who better
understands what we are going thru than we?
At least most of the time during the work week we can e-mail
each other. We have touched.....but not all the way...this
is unlike any feeling I have ever had.
I cry almost every nite. It does make me feel better, but
my heart won't stop aching.....
What are all of us going to do? Life is indeed too short, but
a little touch, kiss and hug makes me so happy.
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