Is a happy ending possible?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2008
Is a happy ending possible?
7
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 11:54pm

I'm fairly new here but have already felt like I've learned so much reading and posting on this board. Thank you to everyone for your thoughts and comments...


What I'm struggling with right now is whether or not anything good can become of this A. I mean, I'm a mess. I'm hopelessing in love with my AP. He is also hopelessly in love with me. We want to be together but I don't know if we are going to be able to do what it takes to make it happen. I am closer to it than he is, because I'm realizing that I'm not happy with my H, with or without my AP. So maybe that's the good? I don't want to have another A, I just want to be with my AP, start a family with him, grow old with him.


Hypothetical, I leave my H, he leaves his W, is it really possible for us to be together someday? Why do I want it more than I remember wanting anything? I feel like I am experiencing love for the first time in my life and I don't want to/can't let it go...


Hopeless... :)




Edited 6/28/2010 2:09 am ET by figuringitoutin08
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 12:51am

I have to say - I share the same hope. AP and I are in your exact situation - and I am hoping for my happy ending as well - he is leaving his W, and I my H - and we're hoping for the best.

That being said - I am sure it is possible, a happy ending, but it is messy and ugly and tearful and emotionally draining in the middle - put on your big girl boots and be prepared to be very understanding and forgiving if you pursue it.

for me the transitionary unrest is worth it - and I feel that we've been through enough that we REALLY know who we each are and what we want - and we're both committed to it - and that means the world to me - it's an intensity I've never known before.

Good luck!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2010
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 1:06am

I don't want to rain on your parade here, but happy endings in these kinds of situations are not likely.

anotherseyes

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2008
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 2:00am

If there is one thing I'm realizing more and more is that IF I do leave my H, it is going to be because I'm not happy. I cannot and will not do it only to be with my AP. That is a hopeless road with nothing but heartbreak at the end. I do realize that.


I don't know yet what I'm going to do. I don't know if a love as amazing as I've found can survive all the turmoil and pain this will bring. Still figuring it out.


For now, I am going to enjoy the little moments, and take time to think about the reality of it all. I think I also owe it to my H to go to T, at least on my own.


Never thought the phrase, 'Ignorance is bliss' could be more applicable to a situation! Sheesh.


:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 7:48am
As has been said, a happy ending is possible, but unlikely. We have had a few happy endings on this board - the people migrated over to the "after the affair" board here. If you read around there, you can find some happy endings.



However, there was more than one case that appeared to be a happy ending and it still went all wrong. Guys who left their wives, moved in with their APs, sometimes for a couple of years, and then went back to his wife. In one case on AAS their was an AP who married his AP, and then still went back to his wife. So many "cautionary tales" over there - and a few that seem to be truly happy endings.



It's rare enough that I surely wouldn't count on it.

Proud to be a





You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull

Proud to be a





You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 12:29pm

I hope you get your happy ending. :)


I don't expect one for my situation at all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2010
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 2:40pm

Hi Figure,


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2010
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 4:55pm

Hi Figuringitout,


I don't expect for my AP and I to have a happy ending. In fact I suspect that we will end very badly, hurt, and heart broken from this A.

 


Much peace & Love,


Rayne


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