Has anyone else made drastic changes?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Has anyone else made drastic changes?
11
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 5:12pm
With all of the talk today about botox, chemical peels, and clothes shopping, I would like to ask if anyone has made drastic changes as a result of your EMA.

Making changes in your life is a sign of having an affair and I am displaying all of the signs. I have changed drastically and I think my H may suspect something. Since my A began in Sept., I have lost 20 lbs., dropped from a size 8 to a size 2, and had breast implants. Of course, I have also changed my eating habits, started exercising more, and completely changed my wardrobe. Friends and family are really starting to wonder about me and a few have asked if I have a new boyfriend. Ofcourse, I believe that you should deny, deny, deny.

Has anyone else made changes to themselves? Are your friends or your H suspicious?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 5:21pm

oh god! nothing like that... in fact... I'm more content and happier about my body now that I have ever been.

Sweet
Co-Community Leader My

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 6:22pm
Hello girlfromat!I've made the change of trying to lose weight not only because of the a but for myself.May I ask how you lost 20 pounds?Care to share?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2002
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 6:34pm
I made changes before the relationship started. I was so anxious over the first spark of interest that I lost 7 lbs in two weeks, and another 4 in the following two weeks, before I stabilized (I would have been anorexic if I hadn't caught myself). However, that first spark happened just a few days after 9/11, and partly I was heartsick over my losses from that day as well. It all ended up with an attitude of, "How could I possibly care about food at a time like this?"

I did go back to wearing more of the sexy lingerie that I wore before I had kids. But I was ripe for doing that anyway. I had a lot of it at home that DH and I enjoyed, but I started occasionally wearing it during the day, too.

And I had a brief skincare crisis early on in the relationship, in which I started panicking that one day my OM would wake up and wonder what he was doing with an older woman, so I bought a couple hundred dollars' worth of expensive skincare products. On the bright side, they WORK, so I've stuck with them!

No one would wonder if I had a boyfriend. I am a very low-key person. It also didn't take long for me to realize that my OM would still adore me if I dressed in plastic bags, gained 50 lbs, had a disfiguring accident, was paralyzed from the neck down, or was 85 years old.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 6:50pm
I’ve started buying lots n lots of lingerie!!!...Started making regular trips to the dermatologist when I hit the big 3-0, so that really didn't have anything to do with MM. And like Sweet, I’ve always been lucky to be naturally thin and happy with my body –- got the good genes there (got the bad ones in my frown lines)!

So I guess I haven't made any changes that anyone would notice...


Charlotte

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 7:36pm
I have enjoyed reading the reply from all of you guys. Carebear, I have lost the 20 lbs. with determination, eating less, and exercising. No carbs, no sweets, lots of water. It has always been easy for me to loose weight, I just needed the motivation of a new man in my life.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 8:17pm
girlfromatl, you are indeed lucky since you can loose weight if you want to. Its not that easy for me - I have PCOS and under-active thyroid that prevents any weightloss. Its not that I look obese or anything but I thought I let some people know that when your thyroid dies on you like mine did its little hard to loose the extra weight.

PS: But then i don't have psychlogical issues like some people here who won't quit.


Edited 12/15/2003 8:20:40 PM ET by julietsfate

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 8:53pm
hi juliet i had thyriod cancer 9 years ago in adams apple .but for em i could gain weight at time i was 31 weight 95 pounds.now am 40 and cancer free but i have to take thyriod pill ever morning. but after had my cancer removed i did gain 25 pounds but i had lost that weight now im 5'4 weigh 104,so did you have cancer to sure hope not. after i was home then went back to hospital i had have ration made me so sick. hugs kimmy
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Mon, 12-15-2003 - 9:02pm
No cancer, Kimmy. Just almost dying under active thyroid. My thyroid has been giving me troubles since I was a teenager. I have been on and off on throid medication for years. Last year my endo said I probably have to be on meds for the rest of my life. Now my numbers are under control, but sometimes they are little too hard to control. We have to keep changing the dose to get the right amount of mefdicine. Its makes it hard to loose the extra 10-15 lbs when you have both pcos and thyroid combined - deadly combination for weightloss.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 12-16-2003 - 8:33am
When this first began, I did start dressing differently. I pushed the envelope a lot at work and people started talking. I thought they were talking about me and MM and saying we were having an A and mentioned that I felt paranoid to someone who works near him and she said yes, people were talking. But what they were talking about was how I was dressing and how it was "inappropriate." I asked around and some people said I looked fine, others said I might want to cut out the low-cut, tight stuff. So I got rid of about half of my wardrobe and started over. I still wore sexy stuff, but not inappropriate. But lately... I don't know. It's like I can't stand what I see in the mirror. I've started to feel like the woman they were seeing me as. I still wear sexy clothes, but I have bought a lot of big sweaters and I'm kinda going back to the more conservative look. Maybe an EDGY conservative look... I don't want to look like "the other woman" anymore. I want to look like the type of person who would never have an A.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Tue, 12-16-2003 - 9:58am

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