has anyone ever divorced their H for AP

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2010
has anyone ever divorced their H for AP
25
Thu, 01-21-2010 - 9:39pm
I was wondering if anyone has ever divorced their h for their AP. Did it work out? Any regrets? I would love to hear your story. I am M with 3 kids. So lost. Love my H just not in love with him.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Thu, 01-21-2010 - 10:07pm
look at the post"Married men don't leave their wives." there is a lady who left her husband for her AP and things worked out. her post is immediately before mine as i responded to her. my post is the last one and hers is immediately before mine. let me know if you see it.
k2002
k2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2009
Thu, 01-21-2010 - 10:49pm

Lexi,


I am the girl that k2002 was talking about under the post in regards to MM leaving their wives. I did leave my husband to be with my AP(now BF). Believe me it wasn't the easiest decision to make. I kept telling myself year after year. I've made it this far in my miserable marriage so what the heck is a couple more years...with the hope that it might get better at some point. It never got better. I had wanted to leave my marriage over 5 years ago. Emotionally abusive and I couldn't deal with it. I had to medicate myself due to severe depression. It just wasn't worth it. I to loved my H but was no where near in love with him.


If you have any questions of just need some advice come my way.

cntrygirl03
cntrygirl03
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2010
Fri, 01-22-2010 - 8:30am

Thank you so much from your input.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2009
Tue, 02-02-2010 - 2:53pm

Don't know if you have the time to search me under btrue2yrself (without the 2 on the end that I have now).

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2010
Wed, 02-03-2010 - 10:33am

Thank you for responding to my post.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2009
Thu, 02-04-2010 - 12:57pm

My computer just spontaneously rebooted, and I lost my almost finished post to you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2008
Sun, 02-07-2010 - 9:46am
Your situation is identical to mine, I swear reading this was like reading something I wrote myself. I don't really have any advise for you as I am struggling with the same decisions but let me know how you make out and if you need someone to talk to i'd be happy to share our stories.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sun, 02-07-2010 - 11:54am

Hi lexi71,

This is probably not what you want to hear, but here goes:

I had been been married for almost 25 years when my AP/BF made a pass at me (out of nowhere). I don't know why, but it affected me very deeply. We basically got together the next day...I fell so hard for him. I tried to carry on behind my H's back for a little while, but it was just too hard. I cried every day.

Long story short, I made sure that my H found out about the A and he left me very soon afterwards. Heck, he left the province even...thank the good lord! We both got lawyers and legally separated, the divorce became final last month.

I am still with AP/BF, I love him more than I ever thought I could imagine. Do I regret it? Yes, sometimes I do...at least with my H there was no drama, and my heart wasn't breaking EVERY SINGLE DAY. AP/BF has problems..he is sucking the soul right out of me, and stupid me, I let him. My girlfriends keep telling me that he is a loser and I should cut him loose..but I can't. If I was married to him (like I wish I could be) I would have to put up with him...and just because I'm not, doesn't mean that I should automatically leave him. At least, that's what I tell myself. I love him too much to leave him. It's a bit of a mess, for sure.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2010
Sun, 02-07-2010 - 2:02pm

I feel like Saturday nights is when the s hits the fan for me and my H.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2010
Mon, 02-08-2010 - 1:50pm

"And to be honest I dont want him to leave her for me, I want him to leave her for him. He isnt happy."

Love how you worded this! Perfect and sums up my situation to a tee! I don't have any other advise to give you as my A is fairly new though I've known AP for 7+ years!

Good luck to you!

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