Married people in affairs can begin to act a little different and also treat their spouse not as loving so yes, the hurt can begin even before discovery. ----i've read this in a few places. i my self can honestly say that i don't treat my husband any different as far as i can tell. things have always been the same. i still say, and will always say, if a spouse doesn't know, they will not get hurt, hence being very, very, careful. That too can be picked up on before knowledge of the affair and it is very hurtful that your once "open and honest" spouse is now private, closed and deceiptful.---only if you do things out of the ordinary, such as all night chats, going MIA, ect. my husband has never picked on a thing.
WHY would you want to do that?!? WHAT would you gain from it? Absolutely nothing!! Sounds like you are hurting and that you've always been revengeful. Let me tell you, I used to be a revengeful type of individual myself and thought about getting revenge when I found out my H had an A.
Although this scenario is possible (anything is possible), I think there's a much greater chance that violence would occur if the affair was revealed, not that violence would be prevented.
There are so many more cases of husbands killing both their wives and their wives' affair partners than of affair partners killing their APs. Granted, this often happens when there is a discovery that has nothing to do with anyone telling the spouse - just an accidental discovery in some cases.
The truth is, we don't know what situation will lead to violence (or end up preventing violence) - any and all of them in an affair could do so. In some cases the spouse has moved out and on with their life and may even be married to the former AP when the ex-spouse kills one of them or both of them. The infamous Betty Broderick case comes to mind - but there are many many more that are not so infamous.
Some would say that I fell from grace... but I didn't.
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Rat,
WHY would you want to do that?!? WHAT would you gain from it? Absolutely nothing!! Sounds like you are hurting and that you've always been revengeful. Let me tell you, I used to be a revengeful type of individual myself and thought about getting revenge when I found out my H had an A.
Maybabee,
You can read my previous posts because I don't want to reiterate what I have said but..... I would want to know if my wife were having an affair.
I don't think anybody should contact anybody for REVENGE.
Goddessautumn,
I recently thought about you:)
Although this scenario is possible (anything is possible), I think there's a much greater chance that violence would occur if the affair was revealed, not that violence would be prevented.
There are so many more cases of husbands killing both their wives and their wives' affair partners than of affair partners killing their APs. Granted, this often happens when there is a discovery that has nothing to do with anyone telling the spouse - just an accidental discovery in some cases.
The truth is, we don't know what situation will lead to violence (or end up preventing violence) - any and all of them in an affair could do so. In some cases the spouse has moved out and on with their life and may even be married to the former AP when the ex-spouse kills one of them or both of them. The infamous Betty Broderick case comes to mind - but there are many many more that are not so infamous.
Some would say that I fell from grace... but I didn't.
You've got a lot of choices. I
Going to agree with Lexi on this one.
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