Having the Talk
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Having the Talk
| Sun, 08-31-2003 - 2:27pm |
I'm hoping someone can give me a little bit of advice. Since I started seeing my MM 6 months ago, I've kept my guard up so I don't get hurt and have tried to ignore my feelings for him. When it first began, I thought it was just going to be about sex and would end eventually, so I never asked the important questions like if he'd ever divorce his wife, etc. In the beginning, we would go weeks without getting together, and at one point, I was going to leave the company we both work for and move 500 miles away. I've since decided it would be a bad move, and I told him last week that I've decided to stay. He hasn't shown his emotions to me much either and we haven't talked about our situation or how we feel about each other. I think the most we've said about it is that "it is what it is" and that it would have to end eventually. I know that I have feelings for him and I may even be falling in love with him, but the fact that there are so many unanswered questions drives me just batty. I can't stop thinking about him and wondering how he feels. I want to talk to him and ask him where he see's this going and how he feels about me, but I'm just not sure how to bring it up. I want to let my guard down and tell him what he means to me, but I feel guilty about the whole situation. Since I've decided to stay, I feel like now is a good time to have the discussion so we know where we both stand if we're going to continue with this.
So, I'm curious how you and yours broached the subject. Was it right off the bat or what? When did you finally share your feelings for each other?
Any experiences you could share or advice you might have would be sooo helpful right now!
~Sher

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It's been 6 months since our first rendevous, I should say. We've been off and on, because of me. For a long time, I contimplated even seeing him. I turned him down on a few occasions when he asked to meet up. We talked about what we were doing in the beginning, but haven't verbally shared feelings for each other. For about the 3 of the months and up until about 2 weeks ago, I was going to move 500 miles away, so that kind of threw a wrench into things and made things awkward for the both of us. I had my things packed up and shipped, and then it fell through. When I told him I was leaving, he said he would be sad to see me go, but understood. So, it's not like we haven't communicated at all, it's just been a little weird I guess. I don't know! The more I talk it out, the more I think it's me that has the communication problem! It's been me that has been reserved and he's given the green light all the way!
I guess I'm just feeling a little insecure right now because I've been the one driving this train lately and not him.
How weird! Do you have AIM?
=)
Edited 9/22/2003 1:43:35 AM ET by lexylew
Edited 9/1/2003 7:38:13 AM ET by englishrose24
I am sorry, but I think you are cruising for a real heartache if you try to "have the talk".
On an added note, I dig how Yoga doesn't sugar coat things...her and I are much alike in that aspect, she's just a tad more abrasive at times. But hey, how boring would this board be without diversity and a little bit of controversy?
Liberal
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