Ok, first of all, OF COURSE he's having marital problems. Afterall, isn't that what most people have when they enter into affairs. In other words, so nothing has changed, I assume.
Regardless, I'm a little curious as to why this would make you a "mess". After 9 months of NC, provided you did some work on yourself and why you were involved in the affair in the first place, I would think he wouldn't be able to "get" to you.
My advice is to not let yourself get sucked back in again. Who cares why he didn't follow through. If he does call or stop by again, I'd decline.
Libby, stay mad, but stay mad at him. DO NOT take it out on his W. DO NOT call her. The problems in their M are between him and her. Don't get in the middle. Don't take revenge on her, she's done nothing wrong, except be M to him. It won't work out the way you want it to, and could even get very ugly as you have absolutely no idea how she could react.
I suggest you just let him go, ignore him if he calls again.
Please forgive me if I'm confusing another's story with yours, but I thought you said this A never actually got physical. It was more of an phone conversation/lunch date A. Is that correct?
So what, exactly, would you call his W and say? I had lunch with your H? Your H called me before, but then stopped calling for 9 months, then called again to go to lunch?
Ok, first of all, OF COURSE he's having marital problems. Afterall, isn't that what most people have when they enter into affairs. In other words, so nothing has changed, I assume.
Regardless, I'm a little curious as to why this would make you a "mess". After 9 months of NC, provided you did some work on yourself and why you were involved in the affair in the first place, I would think he wouldn't be able to "get" to you.
My advice is to not let yourself get sucked back in again. Who cares why he didn't follow through. If he does call or stop by again, I'd decline.
It actually makes perfect sense.
thanks for your insight obxbell.
your
Libby, stay mad, but stay mad at him. DO NOT take it out on his W. DO NOT call her. The problems in their M are between him and her. Don't get in the middle. Don't take revenge on her, she's done nothing wrong, except be M to him. It won't work out the way you want it to, and could even get very ugly as you have absolutely no idea how she could react.
I suggest you just let him go, ignore him if he calls again.
Pisces
Libby-loo, I totally agree with Pisces.
Please forgive me if I'm confusing another's story with yours, but I thought you said this A never actually got physical. It was more of an phone conversation/lunch date A. Is that correct?
So what, exactly, would you call his W and say? I had lunch with your H? Your H called me before, but then stopped calling for 9 months, then called again to go to lunch?
Hey libby_loo :)
What went wrong is that you allowed him back in when apparently
LOL!