He Loves me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2010
He Loves me?
6
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 6:03pm

We are going into our 3rd month of the A, but we had a relationship about 8 years ago, now we are both married.


So last week AP says "I love you". My response wasn't really encouraging.... first

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
In reply to: itsmycake
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 6:19pm

You could tell him you really don't like discussing feelings, and that it is what it is, regardless of how anyone feels. Hey - it seems like enough of the male APs around here do that LOL!

As far as "in love" and "love"... it's strange, most people here say they "love" their spouses but are "in love" with their APs. Seems to be a more common thing than the other way around. It's all how you define it I guess. Some people think infatuation is being "in love". Infatuation is when you are on a chemical high when you see him, you can hardly eat, you have butterflies when he walks in the room and you tingle when he touches you. You don't need much sleep and you have lots of energy too! Infatuation is a chemical thing, your body really does make all these chemicals that make you feel good. Wish I could have a bottle of it LOL.

"Love" is a steadier thing. It's there for the long haul. That person's welfare becomes more important to you than your own. Your body also produces endorphins when you have a long term relationship with someone and are in their presence, but it isn't the same crazy chemical high that infatuation produces.

I guess what matters is what your AP's definition is, if you want to have that conversation.

Proud to be a





You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull

Proud to be a





You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2007
In reply to: itsmycake
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 7:13pm

I can never

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2010
In reply to: itsmycake
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 7:37pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2010
In reply to: itsmycake
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 8:20pm

I'd have to agree with this.

anotherseyes

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2009
In reply to: itsmycake
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 11:28pm
wow... you just described my feelings for my XH....
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2010
In reply to: itsmycake
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 11:19am

I think I have a major case of "Infatuation" but also I do care for his well being & always wish him love & happiness. He gives me a good dose of that "feel good" that I get high from it & wish it never leaves. I really do feel he's my "addiction" because I go through withdrawals when I don't see him after a few days. This is crazy how I feel this way & like an addict I always say "just this one last time and I'll leave him alone". Can't say I ever keep my word because I find myself going back.


Theres this song by Jamie Foxx called Overdose. This is exactly how I feel & the lyrics explain it to the T.


Someone check me into rehab ;)

 


Much peace & Love,


Rayne


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