Heartbroken- please help

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2009
Heartbroken- please help
1
Fri, 07-10-2009 - 11:25pm

I posted one other time on here and things have changed a lot since then.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2009
Sat, 07-11-2009 - 12:32am

If you check out my story, you find very close similarities.....

I keep finding the same stories, of the affair partner all of a sudden have these feelings of immense guilt and pulling back.

My pain is very fresh also. So I know exactly what you are going through right now. While that pains me also, at the same time it is a bit of a soothing thought. Seems to be a very common behavior amongst married men whom are in an affair.
I dont know if he will come back, yours or mine. Well, their are not yours or mine. They belong to their wives as long as they continue to behave this way.
What can we do? I wish I had the answers. I am not dealing well myself. The one thing I am very proud of for now.....I have not broken down and written him a whinging mail when he wrote to me, how sorry he is and so on. It might not be much that I am having right now. And he took so much from me. But if I let him have that last little bit of pride, I could just totally give myself up.
They know how we feel. They know we sit around and wait. They know we are hurting so much......
I am without answers myself.
Keep this in mind though.........if he is trying it for real with her, why is he in contact with you? Could be cause he doesnt want to let go, could be only to make himself feel better for causing you so much pain.
I wrote to mine, stay in touch, but only if you want to, not if you do it cause you feel sorry for me.
Pitty would only add insult to the injury. My opinion...
Hope you feel better soon.......and if you care to know my story, read, Totally floored.....you will find yourself and your own situation in it......