help !

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2003
help !
13
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 9:48pm
How do you end a secret relationship with your married boss without hurting anybody's feelings and without losing your job ?!

DJ

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 2:34pm
ms. afraid -- there's no easy way to do that. there are two ways to do this - first, can you sit down with your boss and tell him you want to end the A, but also want to remain an employee, and a friend? be ready for a negative answer and a new job search. and second, i'd start looking for another job right now and when you secure a new position, THEN tell your boss the A's over and by the way, i'm resigning!

but please take care of yourself in this situation because i'm sure the OM will NOT be happy with you ending the A and might take your job in retaliation. only you know the man!

good luck,

gurl

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 2:38pm
Ok, my thinking on this is; are you married? I agree with Gurl but then again, I say if he fires you because you won't continue to sleep with him pull out the legal card. That will show him:) NMR
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 2:43pm
i agree, nmr, but then pulling that "legal card" wouldn't keep it secret. i can see where she's coming from - a graceful, non-combatant way to just stop the A and walk away. but i've seen lots of office As and they hardly ever end well!

gurl

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 2:50pm
OH, you're right there about office A's generally not ending well. I'm not saying actually use the legal card just threaten it. Of course that would need a good Poker Face:):)If he has a brain at all he will think twice about firing her. NMR
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 3:00pm
oh, nmr, i knew what you meant but she does sound young. and if the boss wants to, he can make her work life miserable. just depends on what kind of job she has and is it worth the aggravation. i'm not an advocate of running away, just getting out of a bad situation while you can, without too much damage being inflicted!

gurl

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 3:01pm
True on all points:) NMR
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 3:07pm
i'm bored!!!!!!!!! and i feel like crap!!!!!

tell me something good. what are you doing this weekend?? H still acting dopey to you??

gurl

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 3:17pm
LOL! I'm bored out of my mind too!!!! Lets see as far as H of course he's still goofier than a road lizard. He's sick right now so it's twice as bad as usual. My weekend plans are: I'm leaving here at 1PM today and going to see that delicious man of mine:):) Later today, we're meeting our friends for Happy Hour. After that H and me will probably go out for a while tonight. H likes to go out late when all the places are meat markets. I think he gets his jollies off by flirting with the youngsters. It's an EGO thing, with him! I'm actually stating to gear up for New Years. Get this not only will we be spending it with about 30 of our closest friends (including MM) but Dream and her H is going to join us. It should be interesting:) Saturday, I plan to have a hangover and Sunday, I’m going to see my son. Other than that pretty boring stuff and what are your plans? Other than being sick? Feel Better! NMR
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 3:24pm
oh thank god you are posting back to me, nmr! i was surfing the net but there's nothing i want to see there either.

whew, i just want to leave here..... I AM SOOOO DONE!

gurl




Edited 2/18/2004 12:16:14 PM ET by gurlfriend50
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: iafraid
Fri, 12-19-2003 - 3:31pm
Sounds like a wonderful weekend planned:) I know, I think, i'm going to jet out of here. I spoke to MM a little while ago, he's doing paper work so I think he needs his desk cleared:):) I know I need mine cleared:) NMR

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