help

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2003
help
3
Fri, 11-07-2003 - 8:17pm
despite all the negatives of an EMA i find myself sadly drawn to FWOB from work and want to see how i can get him to acknowledge there's something between us. we used to be flirty and he would flirt back but we had a good long talk about our personal situations - my marraige being less than happy etc. and since then he's been a little withdrawn. initially he was like walking on eggshells around me but now he's just withdrawn. i've tried to be flirty and joking with him but he responds very "politically correct". he seems to be either too wrapped up in his new girlfriend or else he seems to have lost interest in me as anything but a colleague or both but i have this strange feeling that he does still care about me (not as a colleague) by soemthing he said yesterday. how do i rekindle this - or do i just let this lie and die its own natural death?


this really, really hurts

Avatar for mikkolover
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
In reply to: happy72p
Sat, 11-08-2003 - 4:41pm
i always think that if something is meant to happen it will. Long ago i had a collegue tell me how he felt about ´me. We both walked on eggshells for a few weeks, no more of our general joking and flirting. Then one day i told him i wanted to talk about it. I told him that I really liked him and this was so difficult cause nothing like that had ever happened. ( I was 22 and just married actually). He snapped back with him not wanting to be the other man ( he knew i was M though). I was crushed though, but figured that if it didn't happen naturally, then f' it. No use pushing.. good luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
In reply to: happy72p
Sat, 11-08-2003 - 4:48pm

I agree that there's no point pushing it. It could very well be that he's happy with his girl and doesn't have much interest in pursuing something with you (regardless of how attracted to you he may be).


It sucks to be rejected, no matter the reason.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2003
In reply to: happy72p
Sun, 11-09-2003 - 3:10pm
Thanks for your thoughts. Not much I can do to push it anyway..

I guess I'm just a little confused about why or how I care so much what my co-worker feels or how he acts - its not like we had a great thing going and it got screwed up - we were just good friends (maybe a little more than that) and I hope that we can still stay friends - hope he still wants that. I'm trying to think about what it is that I said to him that may make him change his mind even on that and what I can do to make things go back to normal but like you said maybe the answer is nothing. Or maybe I should just leave it alone and if its meant to be it will happen on its own.

Maybe I can stay away from mentioning my M for the next few times we meet (can't avoid meeting him since we work closely) and talk about completely neutral things and hopefully things will get back to "normal" - whatever that is.

But it means you guys have to listen to all my venting 'bout my marital problems from now on - funny how you can have many friends, no one you can really talk to.