Help! I think I messed up....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Help! I think I messed up....
3
Thu, 02-05-2004 - 9:26am
OM and I tend to joke around a LOT and it is fun and silly but he usually ends up saying "you're retarded" and for some reason, insecurity I think and the fact that "retarded" has always been a tabu word for me just like I don't say "shut up" - it's just nasty and mean....anyway, I wrote him this big long email about my insecurity and how my mom was so mean to me when I was a kid and always telling me how stupid I was and how ugly I was and that I have come a long way to get over my insecure feelings blah, blah, blah - so that was 3:30 yesterday and 1. he never replied to my email 2. he has not said one word except "good morning" to me when he walked in the door today. He walked right by my desk last night as he was leaving work and yes, I was busy, but he usually winks or waves or SOMETHING when he walks by....

I think I may have gotten too serious on him and he's freaking out?? I don't want to make a big deal about it any more than I have - he can call me crazy, silly, goofy, whatever except retarded - is that bad to ask of him?

I didn't sleep a wink last night - I am just worried that I am pushing him away and that is the LAST thing I want to do.

So here I sit waiting for some kind of contact from him before I go nuts!!!

We don't have a "date" planned until tomorrow for lunch - so I can't really even talk to him until then unless it's via email and he won't reply to my email!!! Ugh.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-05-2004 - 10:14am
If your MM like mine he will ignore you for things such as these - as he probably feels you will come around and forget the "non-issue" here. Its a man thing believe me - notheng more - unless we are "seeing" the same person... LOL I don't like it either - but that's way he does it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Thu, 02-05-2004 - 10:22am

hey ts secret -- girl, you probably went a bit overboard in the email and now your MM is defensive, like "i didn't do anything wrong here!" and is giving you a wide berth.

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Thu, 02-05-2004 - 11:03am
you're both right - I'll just play it cool for now - he's due to walk by for his break in about 2 minutes - ack - he just walked by (backwards to face me) grinning the whole way - what a stinker - he probably is wondering why I haven't called HIM this morning - silly man. I feel a LOT better now - amazing what a smile will do!

I want so bad to tell him that H has to work late tonight and see what he says, but I think his GF is home tonight (she works most nights) - I just want some quiet time with him SOON!! we can NOT talk at work other than daily BS, way to risky.

Thanks for bringing me back down to earth girls - you're the best!!

Oh and my lunch is today - and I am NOT telling!!!