help...need advice...very confused!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2003
help...need advice...very confused!
1
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 7:10pm
I am married and the man that I have been "seeing" is married. He is also my husband's best friend. The only time that we get together is on the weekends for drinks with our spouses. There are occasional times when he comes over by himself without his wife. Whenever we get a chance there is heavy kissing and touching. We did have sex on one occasion. THis has been going on and off for the last two years. We have tried a few times to get together but that always seems to fizzle. Then one night I spent the night at his house and his wife had to go to the store. He told me that he couldn't do this anymore and that he loved his wife. He said he feels incredibly guilty. I told him that I understood and left. Well that next week I called him and apologized for any problems that I may have caused and we agreed to just be friends. Well two days later I called his wife and she wasn't home so the two of us got talking. He was very sexual over the phone. He said that I was beautiful, fun and an unbelievable lover. But he did say that he was in love with his wife and he stills feels guilty. So now he wants phone sex!! What the heck is he thinking? We talked on the phone for about an hour about everything (and he doesn't talk on the phone). I am just very confused. One minute he says that he doesn't want me and then the next minute he calls to have phone sex. He says that I am his fantasy. I know this man wants me badly. But he loves his wife. How can this be? How can he love his wife so much, but all he thinks about is me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 8:42pm
It is possible for him to do this back and forth thing because your off limits and are his taboo! It is very sexual and arosing to want to/or have sex with someone that is off limits. It's one of the biggest turn on's for men and women and is rated up there as one of the biggest fantasized about seneros.(sp) sorry. Anyway, If you want to play along then do so but set limits that you can live with and make rules together, otherwise I'd tell him to not keep acting this way and avoid him if neccessary. Good luck.

Wishing