Holidays
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Holidays
| Mon, 10-20-2003 - 11:28am |
I am fairly new to this message board (have been lurking for a while) and also fairly new (2 months) in my affair with a MM...I will tell my story another time...when I really feel the need to put it out there for everyone to read...I feel more secure just keeping it to myself right now...but my question is...How do you handle the holidays? How do you handle being without him and the emotional aspects that go along with it? I think I will be ok for Thanksgiving...I'm more concerned with Christmas and especially New Years...how will I possibly get through New Years without him?
UnexpectedOW

ItalianPisces
Needless to say. I didn't, :). Now the holidays are coming again, but this time, hopefully, I'll have a better grip on things.
The big mistake I did was not keeping busy & letting it overwhelm me.
It helps to get through the holidays and weekends by not building up expectations, remaining realistic, and keeping busy and balanced.
I think that a holiday can be celebrated on any day! You can plan a special day for you and he to celebrate Christmas, and schedule that day for after Christmas - in this way you have "Christmas" with him to look forward to. Or New Years - if you will miss ringing in the New Year with MM, plan to ring in a different midnight with him - make your own "New Year". What is a few days or weeks...the actual holiday is only a label for the meaning of the holiday - the actual date is set by government officials and most holidays are not celebrated on the original date.
During the actual holiday, make sure you have scheduled plenty of fun time for you, and your family if applicable - you need and deserve to be happy and enjoy *any* day regardless of any one else!
The weekends have never been difficult for me, as that is his time with his family, and my time with mine. The holidays are no different - it's the nature of an affair in that we lead seperate lives and I don't expect to share holidays with him. However, this is the first year I won't be able to share each holiday day with my children (wah!!!) as I am seperated/divorcing. Even if I am alone on any of the holidays, I still intend to enjoy the day - simply because *I* love the holidays! At least, that is how I feel now...
Of course you will survive - there are much worse things than missing "a day" with MM, aren't there?
Hugs,
Meow