holidays are so sad!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2003
holidays are so sad!!!!!!!
Tue, 12-16-2003 - 12:47am
I know I posted earlier about how I've been feeling during the holiday season. I feel so sad, because I can't be with MM in the capacity I would like. Both of us were pretty quiet the past few days at work. MM and I were talking, and he says he thinks that he's a bad dad. Not about his kids, but about my daughter. He was commenting that he's missed so much of her life. DD is 3 1/2 now. I could see that he was sad, and tried to reassure him. He sounds like a great dad. I know he loves the kids he has with W. I know that he loves hearing everything I tell him about my DD. It's the situation that we're in. I'm married, he's married, we both have kids. It's harder on him to leave, because W is so dependent on him. I can see her dragging out the D for years. Then I can see her screwing him money wise in the end. On the other hand, H and I have talked about D. The only thing holding us back is DD. I won't leave her, but I can't take her away from H. DD loves H, and has known him as her daddy all her life. She adores H. Therefore, MM and I decided to wait until the kids are older to make any type of decision on our R. We want to be together, but at the current moment, it's not possible. Any advice on how to make the wait easier? I know that just because we may wait, it doesn't mean that we'll end up together. We might decide to end things in the future. At the moment I don't see that happening. I'm secure in my feelings and the knowledge that he returns my love. If it stays the same, I will be here for him.