how are you working out your relationship?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2009
how are you working out your relationship?
Wed, 08-13-2014 - 1:41pm

I'm usually a lurker.  There have been some major changes in my life.  Was hoping someone on here could shed a little light with their story.
I'm a MW seeing a MM for over 4 years.  We talk and text every day throughout the day and at night whenever he can get to his phone.  We get to see each other at least once a week.  Typically twice a week.  Usually have dinner and spend time together.  Of course lots of physical fun!

I finally couldnt stand living with my husband any longer and a couple of weeks ago, I moved out (married 25 years).  My kids are grown so there aren't any issues there! 

I'm worried about how this will change our relationship.  We love each other very much but I know I'll eventually get frustrated only having him part time.

Anyone else in this situation?  How'd you work it out?

Avatar for khatru1
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2004
Thu, 08-14-2014 - 12:28pm

I'm not in your situation but I can see what you mean. Previously you were both in a position to not move on, or move forward. Now you are in the position to be able to move forward into a full blown , fulltime relationship and he is not.  As you said  I would only imagine if he does not leave his marriage, that you cannot possibly be expected to be ok with a part time situation forever. I would imagine you are going to need to set some sort of timeline to be met, otherwise you move on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2014
Fri, 08-22-2014 - 4:29pm

Im looking at being in your situation with in a yr or so.  (I have to have an exit strategy before I make a move.)  And my comment to mine has always been I will not be single and be with someone who is married.  Not necessarily to put pressure on him in my situation but to put him on notice that if he chooses to stay in his current situation I will not be sitting home alone.  I will be going out with other men.  I feel for you and wish you the very best.  If you ever need to chat, send me a PM.