How Did I Get Here
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How Did I Get Here
| Mon, 11-17-2008 - 6:18pm |
I'm not sure how I got to this place in my life and I desperately need someone to talk to. I can't turn to any friends or family for advice because I don't want to risk getting caught... so I found myself here.
I've been married for a year, together for five years and living together for two. My M is one issue and my EA began about a month ago. My H is a good man, he takes care of me the best way he knows how, but since we've been married I just can't remember the reasons why I wanted to be with him.

Hi Jenny, welcome to the board.
OK, firstly you are not wrong in wanting to find happiness, we all do. But an A will not give it to you. It will give you moments, but when you aren't together, there is confusion, pain, possibly guilt and a whole lot of lows that will make you feel worse than you could believe. Read this board to find out what happens when AP's stop contacting.
Secondly. I'm not going to say end your M, but why are you there? If you are unhappy just a year in, how are you going to feel in 5, 10, 20 years with your H? And I assume you don't have kids yet to bind you further to him.
Don't start an A. Find out what you want for yourself. Happiness isn't dependant on another person, it comes from within and you need to find that for yourself. Don't be afraid to leave your M if you feel it can't be fixed. Or if you feel it can, then take steps to do that. Go to counselling. But above all, do not get into the addictive, brain fogged rollercoaster of an A.
Pisces
Hey Jenny...