how do I do this?
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how do I do this?
| Mon, 09-22-2003 - 7:45pm |
This is all so new to me. I was/am reasonably happily married. MM is as well--for a LONG time. He is over 20 years older than me. He is my best friend, we have grown close through work, recently became much more, after too many drinks. Now we both are very confused and unsure. We are very close emotionally and both interested in more but don't know how to handle it. Neither are wanting to leave our spouses, this really seems separate from them--something we have. Is that possible? Is this possible? How do you do it?

I do believe anything is possible... MM and I have had 'something' going for near on 3 and a half years now... we met at a time where we were both in a very low point in our lives and a friendship developed due to our similar situations... a few months later we decided to take it a step forward.
It was originally all about sex... even though we had a friendship... but over time... for me... and I think him... it is much more. Our relationship has grown through a great understanding of one another.
We are both married and we both have two small children... and despite problems in both marriages... neither of us is looking at walking away... and I honestly feel that over time... we have helped each other make them better.
While life is certainly not perfect... I'm content and life is good... when I'm happy, those around me are two. At present I feel that my marriage and my EMA sit side by side to complete the puzzle of my life and without one or the other... the picture is not complete.
However... what works for me may not work for others... I've learn't to accept my EMA for what it is... and assume that's all it will ever be. I've also learned that I need to put as much into my marriage as I do my EMA.
If I was you... I would seriously consider the risks and consequences of an affair with this man... as they will always be there. Is taking it further worth risking your marriage... and also your friendship with him. Also... have you looked at your marriage to see where a problem exists?? While you say you are happily married... there must be something missing for you to look elsewhere... been there done that! And can it be fixed without going outside of the marriage??
As I said... I do believe anything is possible if you're willing to work on it... but I think you must weigh all the pros and cons up before taking the next step... as once you turn that corner... it can be very hard to turn back.
luv and hugs
Sweet
Sweet
Co-Community Leader My