Thats the nature on A ! The ups and downs,the typical rollercoaster is what defines an A.You either have to accept the way things are or get off the ride.Its not for the faint hearted! "but if he left and never came back it would be ok. " then why not use this one month of low contact to complete no contact?You dont have to tell him the real reason,just tell him that you dont want to put him into any risk of being caught as W will be home all the time.See how it works for you. It seems you are not happy in your A.Its time to walk away!
I know the feeling. I love my AP but I go back and forth up and down and sometimes just get soooo tired of the whole situation.
Somedays I think he may leave W and sometimes not and sometimes not sure if I want him to or not. I want to really get to know him more and more to even see if I should be wanting him to leave her and be with me.
Soo many emotions. What I decided to do is give myself an ultimatum. I wont tell him this. I told myself if by such and such time things aren't going a certain way then I will have to let him go. It would be hard but this is too hard to deal with sometimes. I dont want to be in this A for years to come still hoping wondering and waiting. I think I would end up losing my mind.
Maybe you should try the ultimatum thing or try what the other poster said. Let us know what you decide
Same here with my AP and myself except that I am not in love with AP and he is with me. Told him today that I did not like the person that I have become by living two lives and that my religious beliefs are causing conviction within myself. He said that we could back up and just be best friends. I told him I did not see it as fair to use him as my crutch. He said that is not the case at all because we are being upfront with each other about our feelings.
Scarlett, IMO this is a great opportunity for you to end things. Let him just fade out of your life during this month of NC.
Thanks everybody. Its nice to know I'm not crazy for feeling this way about someone I truly love. We are on a rollercoaster ride, aren't we? We talked the other day about it. Our plan was three years. Well it came and went. I had to resign myself to the fact that there is no longer a time table. Now it SOMEDAY SOON. Im just not seeing it. I guess Im just going to let go, we'll see what happens in a month. Im glad your here for all of us.
"but if he left and never came back it would be ok. " then why not use this one month of low contact to complete no contact?You dont have to tell him the real reason,just tell him that you dont want to put him into any risk of being caught as W will be home all the time.See how it works for you.
It seems you are not happy in your A.Its time to walk away!
I know the feeling. I love my AP but I go back and forth up and down and sometimes just get soooo tired of the whole situation.
Somedays I think he may leave W and sometimes not and sometimes not sure if I want him to or not. I want to really get to know him more and more to even see if I should be wanting him to leave her and be with me.
Soo many emotions. What I decided to do is give myself an ultimatum. I wont tell him this. I told myself if by such and such time things aren't going a certain way then I will have to let him go. It would be hard but this is too hard to deal with sometimes. I dont want to be in this A for years to come still hoping wondering and waiting. I think I would end up losing my mind.
Maybe you should try the ultimatum thing or try what the other poster said. Let us know what you decide
Lovely,
I couldn't have said it better. I like your perception and the way you think.
Same here with my AP and myself except that I am not in love with AP and he is with me. Told him today that I did not like the person that I have become by living two lives and that my religious beliefs are causing conviction within myself. He said that we could back up and just be best friends. I told him I did not see it as fair to use him as my crutch. He said that is not the case at all because we are being upfront with each other about our feelings.
Scarlett, IMO this is a great opportunity for you to end things. Let him just fade out of your life during this month of NC.
Thanks everybody. Its nice to know I'm not crazy for feeling this way about someone I truly love. We are on a rollercoaster ride, aren't we? We talked the other day about it. Our plan was three years. Well it came and went. I had to resign myself to the fact that there is no longer a time table. Now it SOMEDAY SOON. Im just not seeing it. I guess Im just going to let go, we'll see what happens in a month. Im glad your here for all of us.