How do you get away with it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2003
How do you get away with it?
13
Tue, 07-29-2003 - 10:40am
OK. I'm pretty sure I can't stop this from happening. I've just been so lonely for so long. Just having someone actually LISTEN to me is SO appealing. Now my question is how does this happen without my husband finding out? Any advice? I feel so bad trying to be sneaky. How do you carry on with someone else without your spouce finding out?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2003
Tue, 07-29-2003 - 4:36pm
Liberal,

Very well said hope you don't mind I have taken some of the pointers you have given. I am fairly new to my A (4 mos) and all of what you said makes perfect sense. Others on the board have said similar things and I have found that they are right, H does not suspect anything since I have gone back to the way things were with us. It takes a little patience on my part and a lot of acting LOL but it does make a difference.

Thanks again. DAF

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Tue, 07-29-2003 - 9:32pm
Hi secret and welcome,

I really can not add to anymore to what has already been said. The biggest point... is as hard as it is... remain normal with DH. Take it from someone who has been caught and couldn't deny but still continued the affair. I had to make many allowances and change what I had been doing so that things around home were normal and good.

EMA's are never easy... but they can give you a lot of satisfaction and enjoyment as long as both parties are getting their needs met and understands the other.

This is a great place to vent, cry and even laugh when you need to.

welcome aboard

luv and hugs

Sweet

Sweet
Co-Community Leader My

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Tue, 07-29-2003 - 9:57pm
I could not agree more with you ladies, I did all the things you say not to do, and ya know what, my H found out.! I was all of a sudden so unhappy and wanting a d, I changed how I treat my H, I dress differently, and lost weight, but ultimately I feel out of love with my H, and I can't even act the way I used to towards him, I don't even remember what it was like before I fell in love with my MM. I used to dootle a lot while on the phone, H would ask, why I wrote certain things, I'd write notes for myself, and H would find them. I wasn't very smart.

I like what one woman said, make it your #1 priority to NOT GET CAUGHT.!!

make sure your home comes first, I wish I had. Now my H irritates me so much I can't even stand it, some days I act really well, I should get an oscar, but most days I just don't care... (I don't want to get caught, i just don't care how I treat him) sometimes when I have sex with my H I feel like I'm being raped... I swear, my head is saying stop, get off me, but my mouth is shut and I'm gritting my teeth!

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