how do you handle a stalker wife?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2001
how do you handle a stalker wife?
16
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 11:43am

i have lurked here for a long time, but don't think i've ever posted. i'm divorced and have been in a R with a MM for a couple of years. i knew the W before the A, and we were friendly acquaintances. she recognized early on that her H

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2008
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 1:53pm

Hmmm I don't think there is anything you can do, per se, other than getting a restraining order.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2001
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 2:10pm

he is worried about getting caught to a degree. that is why we don't have a regular time that we meet at my place. however, we cannot afford a hotel room to spend an hour or two together a

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2009
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 2:15pm

she has every right to look for her husband even if it means driving past your house or knocking on your door. There is nothing creepy with that. Meet somewhere else if you are concerned or stop seeing each other if you are worried.


A judge will laugh at you if you even try and get a restraining order. She isnt violent and you are sleeping with her husband.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 5:04pm

One way to get her to stop - stop sleeping with her husband they would work.


Jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2009
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 5:04pm

Well said Jessie!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2009
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 5:45pm
well said!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2007
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 5:47pm
You called the woman a stalker because she is looking for her H. Why don't you talk to your MM and tell him to tell his W the truth. He wants two women. You really should remove yourself from this situation. I sure hope you don't have any children. Children are very observant and they know what's going on even when we think they don't. Why don't you take some time to go on a few dates with single men since you are single. Why put up with MM cake-eating ways and possible hurting another woman like that? Why put yourself in that situation. I can imagine that you can't enjoy your R with MM because of the stress involved with worrying about the W riding by while you are sleeping with her H. That is kind of graveling for scraps IMHO.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2009
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 6:58pm

I agree with the other posters, if you want her to stop driving by your house, you have to give her a reason to stop. There are only two reasons that I can think of:

1. Stop seeing her husband.
2. have your AP (her husband) tell her that their marriage is over and they both have to move on with their lives.

Your AP is playing both of you, it's unfair and uncalled for.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2008
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 7:45pm

Sorry, but just wanted to point out...


Isn't ALL of our AP's playing us and having their cake and eating it too?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Sun, 09-13-2009 - 8:06pm

 

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