How does a SM know?
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How does a SM know?
| Fri, 05-21-2004 - 6:05pm |
I have the opposite question of Legshakermaker. How do you let a SM know you are interested without weirding them out or the statement of "You're Married" comes out? I work with a single guy who clearly knows I am married, he has even commented on my wedding ring and how nice it is ect. Yet I have caught him staring at me, and he kind of flirts with me. So how do I let him know? without it freaking him out or seeming like I am some sort of wanton woman?
Any advice would help.
Thanks
~H~
Edited 5/21/2004 6:06 pm ET ET by missheatherfl

Well I have been there......... I am a married woman and found a single guy at my work extremely attractive. He never really caught my eye until he started talking to me one day. It was small talk - for example - he said "we keep bumping into each other today" - he seemed interested but back-off-ish.........cause he knew.
I knew he thought I was attractive because when I started working there that department (all of about 6 people - all cute guys) were saying things about me.
It took me about 6 months of feeling him out and then I just went for it - through email. I told him he looked silly in his hat (he was wearing a Yankees hat when they won against the red sox ) and we live in red sox territory. It was a conversation starter. - I then said something like I wanted to say more but didn't want to "cross the line" - he then asked me what I meant by that and that is where it all started. Long story short I ended up meeting him in the gym at my work - with him very tempted but he backed down saying "you are married" and "you have kids" - He just couldnt bring himself to do it.
my advise to you would be - feel him out - do some harmless flirting watch for his responses. If you think they are positive then go for it. It took me awhile - because my SM was very back-off-ish but clearly flirting.
Hope this helped.....
*ME*
I completely ignore him most of the time and he stares and mildly flirts. I probably never will let be known to him and the thoughts are fleeting. They come and go. I usually go home and have sex with my H and forget all about it.
Needless to say, SM is hotter than hell!
Your stories sound so similar to mine. Sugary: I Have done the EXACT same thing! :) Except I really want to let him know! Maybe I should just throw all caution to the wind and go for it!
I love this message board! I love how I can talk about this and won't be judged. Thank you!
~H~
Nothing ever happened between us , I left that job, but as far as I am concerned if I wanted to really take it further I think I could have. It is a slow dance and you have to be patient if that is what you really want. You will know if you flirt he flirts back and over time it gets more and more bold. But it takes time. I have never been one to assume someone is interested in me THAT way, so I guess it takes time for me because I make it that way
I have several stories like this... I've tried to be good and have succeeded somewhat until now!
dd
Do you think you will go for it? If so, how do you intend on going about showing him you want him? Are you certain he wants you and if he doesn't, could you handle the rejection and awkwardness that may ensue afterwards?
I guess that is one of the things that is holding me back is that I fear rejection. Plus, I don't know if I could handle the guilt. And I also asked myself if whether or not it would be worth losing my marriage over a roll in the hay with some hunk. I'm leaning more towards not.