How many people know about your A?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2010
How many people know about your A?
19
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 6:47pm

I know its probably best that no one knows, but 4 people know about my A. None of them know him or have seen him except my sister. She met him the first time we dated 8 years ago and we were both single then. So, my mother and my sister know.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 7:55pm

Oh my goodness, absolutely EVERYBODY knows about our A...and that probably includes his W!

Seriously though, my AP is not new to the affair game. It's a small town, and most all of our acquaintances...as well as the both of us, have lived here 20+ years. Which means that they are perfectly aware that he and his W do not have a "normal" M. I had a d-day with my H, didn't do very much to hide it actually, and I think that deep down I wanted to get caught (I fell head over heels in love with my AP before we'd ever become physically intimate). So, there was the big scene when my H freaked out on AP, at our local watering hole in front of several people...and the cat was out of the bag. You would think that would have been the end of us, but it wasn't. That was all three years ago now, we hang out together at this pub, all the time, and it's become accepted that we are a couple, how bizarre is that?

Now, if only his W would say ENOUGH...and leave his A**!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2010
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 7:58pm

My best friend knows...she lives in another country so we don't get to talk that often but being able to tell her things helps. Other than that...no one knows...on his end and mine.


That's the way I want it to stay...and why I am so thankful to have this board to come to and vent on when I need to get something out right away:-)

LouLou
LouLou
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2010
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 8:11pm

Too many!


AP and I were friends in high school and dated in college, so he knows my family, has spent time at my house with my parents.

anotherseyes

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2004
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 8:27pm

My AP's W moved out about a month ago; I am S.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2010
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 9:44pm

IRL: Me, AP (who says he hasn't told a soul), and my x-therapist (x b/c she cut me loose as I was about as sane as I was going to get LOL!!)..and T doesn't know anything about him other then he's OM :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 6:34am
Just him, me and you guys :)
You are what you consistently do
You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 7:03am
Absolutely NOONE!
TanZa2920
TanZa2920
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2010
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 9:15am

I have told a few close friends who I can trust and who also give me good advice. My family know I am seeing someone but not that he is M.


He has told his parents!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2010
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 9:30am

I told two of my best friends who I knew wouldn't judge me on it, would offer support, and could keep a secret. Also this board. Both these factors have helped me IMMENSELY in dealing with all the ups and downs, so big thanks to everyone!

He has told his barber (haha, I know eh?) and a good, bachelor (and therefore 'understanding' I guess) friend of his who is willing to cover for him if need be.

That's it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2010
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 9:31am

A few of my best friends know & sometimes I regret that I told them only because "a secret is not a secret if you tell someone". I was always told this but it was so hard for me to keep this dark secret inside and felt I needed to share it and get there opionions on it. They are great friends and have never judged me or my actions. They support and listen to me vent as best they can. On AP's end he's told me that he has never mentioned me to another living soul and never will because I'm M and doesn't want to take any chances. How does he keep something like that to himself. I guess that's the difference between us woman and men. We have to talk and share our feelings, they keep things bottled up.


 


Much peace & Love,


Rayne


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