How much is enough?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
How much is enough?
14
Sat, 11-06-2010 - 9:25pm

I'm not in a good mood at the moment. AP came over last night, it was after dinner so right there was my first clue that he wouldn't be spending the night. It started out very nice....I was in the bathtub when he showed, and he cleaned my kitchen while I was finishing up. While he was cleaning up he had thrown some leftover pizza in the oven, and we kind of fooled around while it was reheating. Technically, there was no sex involved during the wait. So, pizza became ready...he ate his share, I ate mine, and then he stretched out across my legs and fell asleep for an hour. I had to shift after the hour mark, and he slept for perhaps another half hour...and then of course he woke up and told me he was going home! Fine and eff you too!

Well, he called me this afternoon and invited me out for some pool....I took GREAT pains with the way I looked (which was fantastic, by the way!) and met him there. Eventually we started talking about "later"...turns out he was all prepared to come over and "eff" me, but was going home for the evening....I gave him heck...told him how bloody convenient for him, when he didn't have a job to go to, to use the weekend (my only free time now) to do stuff at his house. Just bloody perfect. Then, while he was paying his tab, I left. You can imagine, it pissed him off....awwww, too bad for him.

I can't take much more of this. He just finished telling me, to my FACE...that he loved me, more than once...and then decides to do all his crap sh** at his house, on my two flippin' days off? WTF? So, needless to say we are fighting now...and honestly, I don't give a rats behind. When he told me he loved me, I was SO happy....but it's conditional and I don't know if I can handle that part of

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2010
Sat, 11-06-2010 - 9:37pm

(((Hugs))) benska!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Sat, 11-06-2010 - 10:30pm

:(

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 4:34am

Ok, I get that you feel bad.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 9:47am

"How much is enough?" is different for everyone!

Proud to be a



You've got a lot of choices. I
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 12:20pm
Thanks daisy.....breathing now!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 12:23pm

I've been thinking about you and hoping you are feeling better.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 12:33pm
I understand what you're saying jane, and you are very right....I have found that the more I'm with him, the more I want to be with him. And you also hit the nail on the head when you said I want a permanent partner, because that's exactly what I want.

I'm trying to grow, but I seriously doubt that I have. I'm going to think of this glitch as falling off the wagon, and really...I was tipsy because I hadn't had lunch. I didn't think about that and had 2 beers....and that was it. Thank you for the compliment though. I wish I could believe what you're telling me, but I just can't. Not here anyway. I know that as long as I'm in love with this guy, my heart will be closed to anybody else...that's just the way it is. Wait, I take that back...I think I could have a chance, but as I said, I would have to move away from here.

Anyway, I'm going to pick myself up and start over. I refuse to play games so if he calls me, I'll talk to him. I'm going to try very hard and just live my life for me. If we see each other, great. If we don't, then that will have to be fine as well. As for a future? I don't know how to look that far ahead....

Hope you're recovering well, thanks again
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 12:44pm
I didn't realized there were different types of A's. Aren't they all, for the most part, one big rollercoaster ride? I do agree with you though, his W and I ARE being played for fools....but she has the house on the river, and the lovely yard....is retired and can do whatever the h*ll she wants. So really, how much of a fool can I call her? Why the heck would she care if he's there or not? She's getting exactly what she wants, and I'm helping her by keeping her H "occupied". I know why he stays....he loves his house and doesn't want to lose it. I've already told him how shallow I think he is because of it...but he doesn't really care what I think.

I agree with you, I should just hit the bricks and end this. Somehow though, my spurts of happiness still outweigh the misery in between....
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2010
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 12:54pm

Many ((((hugs)))) benska!

I can't really offer up any advice that hasn't already been given to you.

anotherseyes

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sun, 11-07-2010 - 1:07pm
Thanks lexi,

Part of my gloom was the two lousy beers I had on an empty stomach....I do tend to blow things out of proportion when I'm drunk. I've been so good on that front too :-(

I'm not going to worry about it anymore. If I see him today, then fine. If I don't see him today, then that will be fine as well. I have things that need doing....and do them I shall.

I do think though that again, he freaked himself out by telling me how he feels about me...and ended up backing away. We talked on the phone last night and he told me that he needed to get this stuff done so that he can get another job. Just wish he'd tried explaining that to me, instead of just taking off.

I'm over it. Thanks lexi

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