how to reject? multiple AP's? help!
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| Tue, 07-14-2009 - 9:51pm |
Ok, so I first want to apologize for my rambling. A bit of a back story. I posted about a month ago about how I had 3 potential AP's and I didnt know which one to go forward with. They all had positives and negatives. I am pretty inexperienced sexually, but the general consensus on here was to try them all and pick the best one in bed since they all met my emotional needs. I didnt go jump into bed with 3 guys... just 2. :) They are totally different scenarios.
One is able to meet often(like every week) for an hour or so. He gives me emotional support and is decent in bed. Way better than H. He cannot talk on the phone, but can IM during the week days.
The other guy lives on the other side of town, and has kids (so do I) so getting together is much harder. About 1 time a month. He is amazing in bed, but a little more experimental than I prefer, but nonetheless, amazing. HE can talk on the phone all the time, and text all day. Also IMs at night.
Both guys think I am their only AP, and I dont like lying to them. Also, I do not like having more than one AP. I feel like it is even MORE wrong. How do I pick one, when they are soooo different? Anything to look for? Any advice from someone who had to make a decision?
Ok, here is my other question... So Today I finally met up with the 3rd guy. I felt like I needed to, for myself since we had been talking so much, and had chemistry when we met up for coffee and stuff. I thought maybe he would be the perfect combination. I was soooo wrong. It was horrible. I wouldnt want to be with him, no matter what. Nice guy, but not good in b. Sooo, how do I let him know I dont want to see him anymore without ruining his self esteem? I feel horrible, but IT was horrible...

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>BTW I still have regular s*x with my DH. It's a regular thing and if I tried to change it, that would be a huge red flag to him. I don't mind at all. Sure it's boring but comfortable in it's own way. KWIM?<
-jana
Absolutely nothing can change or it throws up the red flag, most importantly IC with the DH. It really helps being a good actress at times.
I think if I started doing it with H THAT would be the red flag...
Today I got to see the second guy today. Only our 3rd time seeing each other for PA... We talk on the phone alllll the time, and on the internet. I was starting to feel like I would let him go because I do not get to see him much, but it was amazing.
He is seriously AMAZING in bed... And, after we just hung out and talked for like an hour or so, and I loved that too... Its not like emotional talk, just friendly. It feels so nice to have someone to just chat with. It seems like when H and I talk, its about the kids. When AP 1 and I talk its just dirty talk.
I think I may have made my decision about AP 2. HEs not going anywhere... Now I just have to decide whether to keep #1 around or not. and HE is the one looking at a place for just us... hmmm
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