How To Say Goodbye If At All
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How To Say Goodbye If At All
| Sat, 12-20-2008 - 10:24pm |
I know what I want to do. I want to just never return any of his calls or emails. He left me one asking to see me when he returns from his tropical paradise with his family. I could email him a goodbye..or just never respond and leave him to wonder?
What do you think? I'm going for the no response thing. I think silence speaks volumes.
Just wanted some thoughts.

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Hey Logan :)
I can't remember.
Well..I've made a clear message one time saying we should just end things and move on. He went on to tell me he thought I was over-reacting. But we were still working together at that point and I had to see him. Now, I don't. I've remained in NC for about a month and I was doing well last time until he emailed me.
I could block his email and just never know if he tried. He rarely ever called me, so I don't worry about the phone as much.
So..just not say a word? I kind of like that because he's done that to me so many times. But do I want to stoop to his level? Or I could just email him and say It's Over!
Yeah..I need fresh NC buddies!!
Well, I'm not a fresh NC buddy, but I can be fresh :)
I think, Logan, that I would say nothing, block and walk and not look back.
You are very fresh Clarity..Thank you!!
Yes..I'm blocking and walking and NOT looking back. I think I'm even ready for the EAS board again..I feel OK..I don't feel that bad right now. You know..I don't want this. I really, truly don't want this anymore. He is just a guy and not a very nice guy. I never wanted to fully admit that. But he's not. Actually, he's a bit of a creep when you think about it.
I will leave him to wonder..Everything is gonna be OK. But you know..I'll have my moments of pain and feelings of abandonment again..but I think this time I've truly had enough!
Logan,
I vote block him and don't answer if he calls.
>>>"He is just a guy and not a very nice guy. I never wanted to fully admit that."<<<
Good for you for finally realizing and admitting to that. It was NOT nice of him to blow you off before he goes off to a nice Tropical vacation with his SO. You want to know why he blew you off? Because he didn't want to have to carry any guilt with him. He wants to be able to be really "lovey-dovey" with his W without any thoughts of what the two of you did prior. He's smart. He's protecting his interest but still throwing you crumbs so you won't totally go away. Don't let him keep disrespecting like that.
There's a nice single guy out there wanting for you to free yourself up totally from this going nowhere A with a MM.
"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."
- Ramona L. Anderson
Logan....
You know I think it's the realization part, too. When it hits you that you care for someone more than they care for you and you surrender. You just know it's your time to go. That's what I'm feeling right now. I asked my XAP to please let me go if this wasn't real to him. If he didn't have any true feelings for me and he didn't. But his actions continue to speak louder than his words and I simply cannot ignore it any longer.
Yes..going NC and not responding to him is the way to go. I have the ball in my court and I like it that way. Very much! I don't want to continue to wait for a response from him. Not anymore. I'm sad, tired, angry, OK, fed up, jealous that he's in the sun and happy and I'm struggling, sad for his W, too cuz he's trampling on her dignity and respect as well.
I'm looking for some comfort because all of this just brings up so much abandonment issues for me from my past. The constant wanting someone who is simply not there. Of looking for validation from a bad man when I shun the ones who are good to me. I wish I could be content with kindness. I think I'm slowly allowing myself the dignity and respect I keep pushing away. The respect I deserve. Closing the door..kicking him to the curb..dumping his sorry a*S is the first step in my recovery.
Peace & Love Happy Holidays To All of YOU!!
Thanks for just being there...this forum means so much to me!!
Wow - hi everybody....I have never been in an affair before and this one is only 2 months in and I'm sick of it already - we haven't seen each other since the first initial physical thing which left me breathless (no sex in 4 years for me so it was an intense feeling and very intimate, kind loving and yes hot and sexy) -- but he has been traveling twice and back twice since then with THanksgiving in between and we still haven't seen each other though I have a small birthday gift for him that he knows I want to give.
His last e-mail to me on Thu was this:
I
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