how to take the next step?
Find a Conversation
how to take the next step?
| Mon, 02-09-2009 - 2:38pm |
Hi ladies,
I wanted your opinion. I am a MW. There is a single man who has expressed his undying love for me. We have become the best of friends over 2yrs. I know he loves me but he respects me.
It has been bothering me for a long while because I believe I have fallen in love with him.

Pages
Hi Woody,
I am assuming you are male.
Thankyou for your responses.
Thing is I am a coward. I know for a fact that this other man loves me but taking into consideration that he respects my marriage, what exactly do you think I should say.
Let me tell you, even asking you such a direct question is hard for me, even though I am anonymous.
So I really want to hear what you think would be appropriate. This OM has spoken to me already about his sex life and I have briefly mentioned mine after a lot of coaxing. SO he does do 'wrong' things and for him to tell me how he feels even though he knows I am married and knows my family shows that he is not as 'good' as he sometimes say.
WHen he looks at me (I don't see him very often, once every 2 wks, but we speak almost daily) I can see the lust in his eyes, but I have been such a sheltered person all my life. My husband is the only man I have ever been with and I am almost 40yrs old.
So I just don't know how to bring up the topic and then what to say.
7 extra years of misery.... ummm not for me!! lol I was in a very unhappy and abusive marriage. The day I left was one of the happiest days of my life...
I guess I want to be a big believer in a happy, romantic marriage. I went through the bad marriage situation and I don't want to settle for that anymore...
And if I was lucky enough to have a good marriage I would do everything I could to make it the best... JMO... not judging anyone of course since I am involved in an A, too, and I had several A's during my horrible M - I kept looking to satisfy the emotional needs that were being completely ignored by my ex-H. I wish I was happily married. Maybe I am idealizing it too much, lol!!
trixie ;-)
Hi all,
Wow, I am just checking in. There are so many deleted posts. What happenned? Was I receiving a lashing?
Do you really want to take the next step? Your post does sound so and i get a feeling of it being already very emotionally charged! I would strongly advice to not jump into PA. Confess feelings first then take it slowly to PA ,if you cant resist.
As to what to say 'exactly', speak your mind truely. Keep it short at first then go with the flow.If he already knows how you feel then he must be waiting to hear !! There is not a single human being who doesnt want to know that they are loved.
So go and just do it! whats the point in suffocating yourself ?
Make that call or write that email, just do it and come back to post how it went!
(( hugs ))
Hi! :) Posts are removed when they violate our Terms of Service or otherwise disrupt the board. If you have questions about deleted posts, please email relationshipscm@mail.ivillage.com rather than posting to the board.
Thank you!
**Take the iVillage/BlogHer Valentine's Day Survey**

Love Boards ~ About Our Boards ~ Customer Support
_________________________________________________

Pages