I Emailed Him

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
I Emailed Him
9
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 2:04pm
I need a little angel or something. If you read my 'I'm Having A Hard Time' thread this post will make more sense. After a week of not one email from him I emailed today. I've emailed a few times during the week & heard nothing from him. He was flirting, having fun, then absolutely nothing. I simply asked that he let me know what's going on & that he is confusing the heII out of me. I can't take it. I need an answer of some sort. I don't think that's too much to ask. Why does he just get to disappear? NOT FAIR!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2008
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 2:44pm

I'm not sure if you need an angel? But if your meant ANGER, I'll help you with that:)

Rule #1 (unrelated to A, applies to any relationships with men in life) - The More You Chase The Man, The More He Runs Away!

Basically it means - never call him more then once. Never leave more then once voicemail. Never email him again if he did not email you back. Never appear needy. Have your own life, your own interests, your own friends, because you COME FIRST. The less you care, the more he will be interested.

Good luck. I think you have your answer. You haven't heard from him for a week - what is it telling you? You should be angry enough by now for wasting your time on a man who clearly does not want you enough.

(((Hugs)))

Angry Vivacious

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 3:19pm

Well I can't say I agree w/your last statement & him not wanting me. This has been his game for 12 years. But I do need to stop chasing, that I agree with.

Edited to add that this is also typical of me emailing more than him b/c his W is always watching him. I don't have that problem being that I can email from work & my H is not up my a55 all the time.

I'm asking for prayers & positives thoughts simply b/c I am very down.




Edited 11/16/2008 3:26 pm ET by losingmyhead
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 3:48pm

I'd be more careful about emailing him if your email is in danger of falling into his wife's hands.


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 5:30pm
Email has been the only way we have contacted each other for 2 years now. He must know what he's doing since he's the one who initiated this. He feels the phone & texting is far too unsafe. She would be checking the list of calls & such. So it's not like this is the 1st time I am emailing him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 5:35pm
Excuse me...I misinterpreted what you wrote.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2008
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 5:51pm

I know whenever my AP has gone MIA I get very angry, annoyed, upset. He has always come back. He hasn't done extended NC more than a couple of times and there has been a reason. I've now made it clear that if he goes MIA I will assume that he's been hit by a bus. Since then, he's been much better. I guess I'm saying that there is probably something going on, some reason you are unaware of that makes it difficult for him to contact you right now. It's up to you if you feel like waiting around to find out. If you feel you don't want to wait, then maybe it's time to think about getting out.
Pisces




Edited 11/23/2008 9:00 pm ET by pisces2008
pisces
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 6:29pm

No problem 'withclarity.' I suppose my title could be misleading like I'd never emailed him before. I know this woman far too well (we were friends years ago) to ever email him at their address.

Pisces-thank you. This is what my GF keeps telling me. Something's up, maybe not having to do w/me at all. My thoughts are 1 of 3 things is going on. 1-she's up his butt about something, 2-they're getting along or 3-Jiminy Cricket's on his shoulder telling him to let his conscience be his guide-LOL! I'd say he was hit by a bus but my H saw him on Thursday passing by. They were friend too. I too feel like my head is not clear nor is it when he disappears. He's done it a few times but never for more than a few days. Recently we went NC for a week but I knew he had things going on at home. We'd been in a texting fury & had to cool off but b/c his W was watching so closely we didn't email for a week. I had warning though. Last year there were times when he would go a few weeks w/o emailing me but for some reason I could take it. I think he hadn't tried to pull away yet so I wasn't so concerned. Plus his W is a teacher & since it was during the summer I knew she was around a lot.

Oh what a tangled web that has been woven :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2008
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 8:47pm

What I have found out in the almost 3 year relationship w/ my MM is that if I don't hear from him it never has anything to do w/ me. Something is always going on at home or with work. Still, if I don't hear from him its hard for me to remember that. I always think the worst too. I hate it, but it just seems to be the way things are when you end up going down this path.

I'm new here. I just discovered all of you and have been reading your posts--nice to know that I am not alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Sun, 11-16-2008 - 9:38pm
Actions speaks louder than words. What is he's actions telling you? If he cares about you, it usually doesn't take a man more that 5-seconds to send off an email....
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