I hope this doesn't offend anyone

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2003
I hope this doesn't offend anyone
2
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 12:43pm

Hello ladies, I really don't mean this to offend - I once lurked on this board when I was sensing that an A was there if I wanted it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 1:38pm

hi lynne and thanks for the heads-up!

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2003
Thu, 02-19-2004 - 10:39pm
Hi Lynne: Thanks for the post, and being an understanding person. As you may have sensed, those of us involved in EMA's are not the monster's society has made us out to be, but truly people in complicated situations looking for support (as you so eloquently put it). You were smart to avoid becoming involved in an A. I wish I would have found or known of this website before I became involved with my MM, maybe I would have thought twice after reading all of the posts. Having said that and for all of the pain and guilt that goes along with A's, my MM has also been an absolute Godsend to me. Family factors have prevented me from leaving my DH and even after 5 years into my A, I still deal with the guilt from all of the deceit as I am in every other way a very honest and upfront person. My marriage is all but over. My H is an alcoholic and a very emotionally abusive man. Ironically, I think maybe I would have left my marriage by now, had I not become involved with my MM. My guilt and feeling 'responsible' for DH's misery has kept me around trying to 'fix' that which I cannot repair. I know, that doesn't make much sense does it? I'm very good at beating myself up about my failed marriage and accepting responsibility for all of the pain he claims that I have caused him. Anyway, I just wanted to commend you for being strong when you could have 'taken the plunge.' I also agree about the "too much information" thing- I've worried about others figuring out my identity and such by lurking around the board. Good luck to you, Virgogirl