I may be nuts....hire a private eye?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2003
I may be nuts....hire a private eye?
8
Sun, 09-21-2003 - 5:02pm
I have lurked and posted on and off for a while now. I have been seeing my MM for about a year (off & on) now and he claims everything is ok at home and he'll never leave, blah blah. I do believe it. Well, actually he used to claim that, now he doesn't say anything much. I guess I have been starting to really have some strong feelings which has given birth to this thought.

I have been TOYING with the idea of hiring a private eye to follow her around a bit to see if she is cheating as well. I don't know what I would do with the info if she was...let it play out, just knowing, or expose it. I don't think I could expose it, that would be too bad.

I know it sounds really crazy and when it comes down to it, I probably wont, but have any of you thought of that. Has anyone actually done it?

I think your stories would be very interesting.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Sun, 09-21-2003 - 7:16pm
That thought has very quickly crossed my mind as they are expensive. Anyway, one question, if you did find out she was having her own EMA, how could you keep that to yourself...isn't that kind of the whole reason for doing it? I'd almost not want to know at all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2003
Sun, 09-21-2003 - 10:55pm
idreamer99 & sweet grapes,

I think you're both out of your F-ing minds. What sense does it make to be in an A, and "wonder" what his W is doing? Who cares if she's cheating. BFD.

What gives you the right to be having an A, and then want to spy on the W of the dude you're doing?

I ain't even cutting this dumb idea a break.

--LG



iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 12:16am
I agree leviguy, although I probably wouldn't have put it as bluntly as you have. But still jdreamer99 why on earth would you even consider that? It makes no sense at all. I might wish that the w was cheating also, but that would mainly be so she wouldn't be sitting at home crying while he's with me. Not literally, but you understand what I mean. Do you think that he would thankyou for your info? I seriously doubt that. Don't do it, just my opinion.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 11:48am
Welcome back, Levi!!! Missed your posts and you were right on with this one!

Lucky

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 1:19pm
I personally have know things about the spouse, but I always ask myself do I want him because she did not want him, because she was doing something wrong to him....and my answer is always the same, I want HIM to want me for ME not because she does not want him or because she is seeing someone else, I do not want HER throwbacks, I want him to leave for US not because she does not want him....does that make sense??
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 1:37pm
I agree with you on that.
Avatar for nomoreregrets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 2:55pm
OMG, ROFLMAO! Levi, you took the words right out of my mouth! NMR
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 5:49pm
Hey, I said that the thought crossed my mind but it was, in fact, a fleeting thought. I'm sure that if she's up to something, it will surface eventually and if their marriage is strong enough to overcome that then so be it. I would want him to leave because he loves me AND their marriage has been suffering a slow death...not because he feels deceived and angry. I could never live with myself if I did that to them.

I am not out of my mind but thanks for being so blunt.