I need some HELP and fast!!!!!!!!
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I need some HELP and fast!!!!!!!!
| Fri, 01-02-2004 - 3:52am |
I (male 47) really don't know where to begin. This is the first time I'v done anything like this, (asking for advise), but I fear I've gotten in way over my head this time.
I'm married to a great lady who does anything/everything for me. We've been married for 19 years. I do love her very much. She is a great person.
Now the problem(s):
When it come to sex, life here is kind of routine and not that great which cause me to look else where. Well this time I didn't have to look far. I have fallen in love with a married lady (29) in my office which I've known for two years. I have been seeing her for a couple of months now and I must say she is the most understanding person I have ever met.
I enjoy being with her, it doesn't matter if we are out having coffee, in the office, or at our Special Happy Place, S.H.P. the hotel.
I know having an affair is wrong, and I would not be writing to you today except for the fact now I'm scared. She has been on a two week vacation with her husband in the States
(we live in Germany) and is expected to return to work on Monday. Of course being with her husband, I have not heard from her in those two weeks, so I really don't know what's going on with our relationship. Before leaving she said things would be "ok" when she returned, but not hearing from her, I don't know. With me being a man, I said "we'll have to see, we may change our minds about each other."
If she comes back and says it's over I would be hurt, but I know this would be the best for us. I would not want to see her go somewhere else to work, I enjoy having her in the same office as myself. But on the other hand if she says things are fine between us that's great with me.
Can anyone give me any advise on what I should do? If she says it's over, how should I behave in the office with her? Since she's been gone I've been thinking of breaking it off but I'm weak and I don't want to hurt her. Plus the fact I do love her very much.
I'm writing to women because I need some good solid advise, fast.
Edited 1/2/2004 4:00:21 AM ET by lost47
I'm married to a great lady who does anything/everything for me. We've been married for 19 years. I do love her very much. She is a great person.
Now the problem(s):
When it come to sex, life here is kind of routine and not that great which cause me to look else where. Well this time I didn't have to look far. I have fallen in love with a married lady (29) in my office which I've known for two years. I have been seeing her for a couple of months now and I must say she is the most understanding person I have ever met.
I enjoy being with her, it doesn't matter if we are out having coffee, in the office, or at our Special Happy Place, S.H.P. the hotel.
I know having an affair is wrong, and I would not be writing to you today except for the fact now I'm scared. She has been on a two week vacation with her husband in the States
(we live in Germany) and is expected to return to work on Monday. Of course being with her husband, I have not heard from her in those two weeks, so I really don't know what's going on with our relationship. Before leaving she said things would be "ok" when she returned, but not hearing from her, I don't know. With me being a man, I said "we'll have to see, we may change our minds about each other."
If she comes back and says it's over I would be hurt, but I know this would be the best for us. I would not want to see her go somewhere else to work, I enjoy having her in the same office as myself. But on the other hand if she says things are fine between us that's great with me.
Can anyone give me any advise on what I should do? If she says it's over, how should I behave in the office with her? Since she's been gone I've been thinking of breaking it off but I'm weak and I don't want to hurt her. Plus the fact I do love her very much.
I'm writing to women because I need some good solid advise, fast.
Edited 1/2/2004 4:00:21 AM ET by lost47

I will keep you posted on what happens. If we end it, I know it will be for the best, and I will miss spending time with her, but omg the pain it causes others.
Thanks again,
lost47
I thank-you for taking the time to read my message.
The reason I worry is, I really love this girl. After not hearing from her in two weeks I'm concerned she may have changed her mind about us. Did I mention she is M too? So you see where I'm going with this.
Before leaving she called me on the cell and said she would not change her mind about us.
We know how time changes things.
Thanks again for the advise. It helped me get through the weekend.
lost47
I've also been reading about the pain the W or H as to go through because of an A and I'm starting to see this is all wrong. Something I knew from the start but after reading it so many times from other folks, I don't think it's a pain I can put my W through. I know I'm not going to leave her.
Maybe it's time I think of someone else besides myself.
Thanks again for the advise.
You indicated you got into this because of a lack of affection, could be, it could be more of an issue with haveing a midlife crisis (I have been there and yes women have them)
considering he age it sounds like you are trying to recapture your long lost youth.
Just a thought.
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