If this AP wont, someone else will ?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2010
If this AP wont, someone else will ?
7
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 10:05am
Having read a few posts,I feel a lot of women are not getting what they want from their AP.Isnt it the reason we have A's ( usually ) ,as we dont have those needs met by our H or within our M??
Wouldnt you rather find another AP than getting miserable with the current one?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2010
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 10:10am

I'm curious as to how many A's people on this board. I'm getting the sense that many of us have had multiple ones.

Personally, I am on my 3rd A, all the while being with the same BF for 7 years. The first one was intense and in the second year of our relationship, and the BF found out about it, and it nearly ruined us. But we persevered, I love my BF, but eventually a year and a half ago, I started sleeping with another guy. Then moved to a different city but we still plan to see each other when I return for visits

Then 6 months ago got swept off my feet by a MM where I work. This one has been a mix of highs and lows.

It's addicting and sometimes I wonder what is wrong with me. Why I seem to have so much difficulty 'staying faithful'. It makes me doubt whether monogamy is 'real'.

What are other people like or thinking?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2004
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 10:29am

Wow,

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2009
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 10:51am

I was having an A with a MM friend for several months last year.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2010
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 12:58pm

I too am on my 3rd A.I had my first when I was S ,with a MM.His W found out and it ended.I was young and looking for long term ( yeh,now I know better).
In my 2nd,I was MW with MM.He blew hot n cold in all the 2 years we were involved.It eventually ended with needs and wants not being met.It hurt as I did love him but soon found my current AP! He replaced the last one and is such a cutie pie :).I do have to compare him with the 2nd one.My now AP loves to love me.He has filled that void which I wanted my exAP to fill but he didnt have it in him.Sex was amazing ,no denying that ;) but it eventually wears off if emotional connection is not there.

So yeh,I am happy in my 3rd A.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2010
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 1:46pm

I'm not sure how old you are, or if you've been previously married, have children, etc, but just know that some people are not capable of life long monogamy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2010
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 3:39pm
I can only speak for myself.

anotherseyes

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2009
Fri, 06-04-2010 - 4:23pm
I have been with my husband for 14 years and this is my first and only AP. I have known him for 10 years and have fallen in love with him over the years. We only acknowledged our feelings in Jan, so it's still pretty new. If things stop between us I will never consider having another affair. AP is the perfect man for me and I'm not a cheater by heart.