If You're happy with M... then why

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
If You're happy with M... then why
37
Fri, 09-12-2003 - 5:32pm


"just wondering"

=)


Edited 9/22/2003 1:47:37 AM ET by lexylew

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Fri, 09-12-2003 - 10:17pm
As I can see it there are three reasons to have an affair:

1) you're either unhappy with your relationship, looking for a way out or a way to fill the void.

2) you're a selfish person that doesn't really empathize with others.

3) you have no impulse control

The second and third of these mean that you need some mental help if you are ever to have a healthy relationship in your lifetime.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2003
Fri, 09-12-2003 - 10:24pm
I agree with you franky. On all the points that you have mentioned. Especially #1. But I also agree that if #2 or #3 is mentioned, they're may be a need for help down the road.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 12:05am
I think your response frankny29 was uncalled for. Why are you on here? To make people feel worse for the things that they already feel awful about. I'm sure your point apply to some, but not all of us are unfeeling heartless people. Anyhow, I just wondered what's your story and why are you so bitter?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 12:11am
I'm surprised by the last couple comments, maybe I was wrong. I thought we were suppose to support each other, not make ourselves feel worse then we already do. I'm sure most of us know if we are unhappy or not in our marriages. And some of us probably are selfish, no strike that, all of us, all humans are a little selfish at times. Some more then others. Don't you all believe in true love? Finding that one soulmate that just fits so perfect? That when you find this person and you just know he/she's the one, you can't take the chance of letting them go? I can't let mm go, maybe that's selfish of me, actually I know that's selfish of me. But somethings you have to live for yourselves. Forget it I'm probably just overreacting. I just don't want to come here to be made to feel worse for what I do. I get that enough elsewhere.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 1:07am
well put Prettyribbons4u!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 1:11am
th


Edited 9/22/2003 1:49:38 AM ET by lexylew
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 1:12am
ROFL!

good good!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 12:51pm
Since you obviously lurk here, we're all curious - what brings you to this board? I bet you're contemplating having an affair, am I right??
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 8:03pm
My reaction to frankny's post was that s/he was a betrayed spouse.

I will be the first to say that while my marriage was happy the thought of an affair was not only foreign to me, but you should have heard what I said about the friends we have that cheat on their spouses. Now I'm one of them. Regardless of my reasons, they are merely rationalizations. OM has shown me how it is possible to love more than one person at the same time and while I don't think I'm wired that way, I understand now that it is possible. So, I'm cutting a little slack to these women who are happily married. They've obviously figured out how to love more than one person at a time. Sometimes I'm a bit envious...they've figured out how to enrich their lives greatly by putting even more love into it. If I'd been capable of that, maybe I'd have had an affair before things here at home got so bad and the marriage would have been saved? I don't know. Can't second guess it now. But I wonder sometimes....

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 10:34pm
deleted

Edited 9/13/2003 10:37:52 PM ET by charlotte1203


Edited 6/1/2004 10:52 pm ET ET by charlotte1203