I'm hurt, I'm angry, and I'm fed up. . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2007
I'm hurt, I'm angry, and I'm fed up. . .
3
Wed, 01-14-2009 - 4:33am

. . . . with all the BS

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I ended up where I needed to

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2005
Wed, 01-14-2009 - 10:06am

whoa. i'm sorry to hear that he never called. i'm sure you have been over the options -

a) he changed his mind
b) he's desperately ill and incapacitated
c) he's been hog-tied by DW who took his phone
d) he's been side-tracked by some other family emergency
and then the last resort i offered earlier this week, e) he was abducted by aliens

all but a) are good excuses. and you a struggling to determine what to do if it is a). that pull between hitting the ignore button and getting closure by sharing your anger. if it is a), then neither of those changes anything - as you already know. it's simply a matter of which action makes you feel better and truly moves you forward to a mindset that is positive for you.

the Ghandi in me says take the high road and hit ignore - you will then be total control.

the Scarlett O'Hara in me says scream your head off - but look where she ended up.

Mrs.

PS i will add the Scarlett O'Hara option puts him in the Rhett position - he could end up hurting you even more.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2009
Wed, 01-14-2009 - 11:33am

As gently as I can say this I think you might have read too much into the original text.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Wed, 01-14-2009 - 11:51am

I am sorry you are going through this. Of course this isn't fair. You deserve better.

Sigh. I am going to say that maybe it was him on a fishing expedition. Checking to see what kind of reaction he would get from you by sending such a text. You got far enough away for his comfort level and he yanked the fishing pole to see if you were still hooked on the line.

I hate to say this, but this time of year, after the holiday brouhaha has died down, always sees so much of this type of thing. It isn't fair. The best thing for you would be to evaluate how things have been without him in your life. Of course you miss him (or what you want him to be), but you have been surviving. You know you can survive and even thrive. So, I think maybe it is time to let yourself. Stop giving him the power to do this to you. Hold onto the angry and fed up. Let them be your allies as you get over this hurdle.

Now, if I can only take my own advice. I am working on it though.

~Shadowz
~Shadowz