I'm a mess

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2009
I'm a mess
15
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 11:16am

I don't know what I'm doing or what I'm hoping for.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
In reply to: lifeofpi
Fri, 06-25-2010 - 8:57pm

pi

Picture yourself Divorced and missing your best Gal pal by the time the vacation roles around ... SO how is that fantasy working for you now ... was it worth it Y/N ... not likely.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2009
In reply to: lifeofpi
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 8:34pm
Thank you everyone for your support and advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2008
In reply to: lifeofpi
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 11:44pm

My dear... don't do it. :) Resist the temptation. Trust me on this one.


I am in an A with my coworker and best friend. My AP is friends with my H and I am friends with his W. We've gone away together in the past. It's always been fun, and now that we started an A, I struggle when the four of us get together. It's torture. We just hung out Fri night, went golfing on Saturday and BBQ'd... and its so far from normal. And we can't stop because we've decided that something has been going on longer than we realized... I genuinely love my AP. I loved him before but I didn't know the depth of it. Now that I do, I wish I didn't. It's so hard. I would love to go back to the night when he kissed me and to not have let it happen.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
In reply to: lifeofpi
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 1:07am

Having an affair with your best friend's husband (and your husband's friend as well) is really the lowest of the low. I'm sorry if my saying this makes you feel bad, but it's just the truth. No way to package it with a neat little bow. IMO, it's just despicable. Because not only are you betraying the person you claim to love, DH, but you are also betraying a good friend. I ask you....how would YOU feel if your husband was putting it to her? My guess is not very good. Too many people these days seem to not really give a rip about how others would feel. Our society has gotten to the point where, hey, if it feels good, do it, regardless of the impact on your life or the effect on others.

Look, I understand affairs happen. I had one myself, regretfully. I agree with the majority. If you feel you MUST go outside of your marriage to get your freak on, then find someone that has absolutely nothing to do with your life at all. Don't f*ck your friend's husband. It's as simple as that. It looks all so titillating through lust-colored glasses, but the reality when the sh*t hits the fan, and it will, is anything but. You came here for a reason. Heed the advice and stop this dangerous game you're playing. It may be ever so much fun now, but it will be disastrous in the end. You can take that to the bank and cash it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2010
In reply to: lifeofpi
Mon, 06-28-2010 - 7:34am

Pi, I can so relate so much of what you're saying.

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