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| Thu, 04-29-2010 - 8:40am |
Hi all
Brief recap- Im a MW in A with MM for a year now. Was blissful the first few mths - lots of lovely restaurants, hotels, lots of loving words and talk of 'one day when our kids are grown we can be together'. Long story short, the guilt overwhelmed him and he ended it twice (only to restart within days). He wants me, has strong feelings for me, but wants to keep it as FWB (ie no 'I love you's) as the guilt is really too much for him.
So here we are, we talk every day, plan to get away for a night soon (done it twice last year) and he sees us together for a long long time (his words).
Im happy with all of this- but admit I loved the passion and the romance and all the loving words he used to say. But Im a realist and know that the chances of us being togeher are slim- and I also know that an AP may not make a great Married Partner- so I appreciate that what we have is for the best- and may be the best we wil ever have.
BUT (and here is my question for you) do affairs really last? Can my AP and I really have this for years or am I stupid for thinking so. Now that there is no risk of 'burn out'- it did burn out but reignitred as a slow burning warm flame rather than the hot burn it was- plus the friendship is solid and we genuinely enjoy each others company- not just sexually.
So what do you think- do affairs last?

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I dunno... I lurk on other boards where cheaters and "other women/other men" are compared to thieves, child predators and murderers! But I think that is a pretty twisted way of thinking. But it does show what we stand to lose if we get found out - very sobering.
You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull
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First I have to say that I PROMISE I'm not cyberstalking :) With each post of yours that I read, I just get a little creeped out that
Its all so true isnt it. As wierd as the affair thing is- it can get wierder :) My AP and I also talk about our marriages and give each other advice/support. Neither of us want the other person to be so unhappy or to have unhappy children. So we offer the odd word of advice. Plus its strangely comforting to have him in a relationship that has gone stale rather than see him divorced and pursuing me or another woman with passion.
You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull
Proud to be a
You've
This is very interesting.
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