An interesting update (yes, already)
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An interesting update (yes, already)
| Wed, 05-12-2004 - 2:00pm |
Just got another email from MM (from the secret account). It was sent before the good bye email, but arrived later. It was titled "Good Bye for Now." He warned me that the other good bye email was coming and said it would be harsh for the benefit of his W. He said he must be super careful now because his wife is tracking everything - apparently even at work. He said he won't contact me any more and that I shouldn't contact him either. He said that it hurts to say goodbye but that he's doing it for my protection. For now he is going to put 100% into his M and see what happens. He asked that I do the same. He said he'd always love me and not to forget that.
OMG. Now I'm falling apart. I want desparately to write him back and acknowlege that I got this email but I think I better not. Hopefully he knows that I got it and I understand. It was easier when I thought I could be angry with him. Now I'm just so, so, so SAD!!!!!
GB2

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I can see why your situation is so very different from mine. I wish you strength to get thru all this, it sucks big time. Good Luck!
Thanks for the well wishes. It certainly is tough, but now you now. He knows how you feel too. You seem to be a very expressive person, as such, he knows. I can tell you are really hurting as I too have met someone that I truely think I was meant to be with. Things just seem so right. My A hasn't ended, but it's been toned down, probably for the better but I did get to see MW today which was really nice. I have to go through with this and see what happens without her influence. My M has sucked so long that maybe it is time to bag it. Only time will tell. God I miss my kids soooo much. I get to see them today which i can't wait. Cheer up, it will get better.
Have a nice visit with your kids today lostvoyage. I'm sure they'll be as happy to see you as you are to see them. Hang in there. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself. As you say, things will get better. And please keep posting here - I'll be looking for updates from you!
Peace
GB2
((hugs))
Circe
This is going to be tough for you. There will be reminders everywhere; places you used to go, songs, food, jeeze the list is endless. You have to tell yourself that for now this is what is best and if was meant to be, it will be. Know that he will be thinking of you too. Just keep going and put the smiley face on. You never know what the day will bring (I need to take my own advice here lol). Saludos
think about it this way. His M has it's own life and must end on it's own. The one thing you don't to be is the reason it ended. so keep close to your heart the fact that he loves you. and cry if you want to!
stay strong - it will be hard but we are here for you
Kikki
No, I haven't contacted MM - and I won't. He asked me not to and I would NEVER go against his wishes. I agree that if his M is going to end, I want it to do so on it's own and not because of me. I never meant to have any kind of impact on his M at all - the fact that so much has happened will always weigh on my concience. Sadly, I rather doubt he'll ever end his M no matter how bad it gets for him. He's afraid to lose his kids, afraid to stand up to his W. But that's his choice and I respect it. Will I hear from him again? Well, maybe. His last email was titled "good bye for a while" - not good bye forever. But I'm going forward on the assumption he is out of my life for good.
As for me, well this is a rather large wound and will take quite some time to heal up. And quite frankly, I think it is one of those deep injuries that needs to heal from the inside out, but will always leave a scar and will ache on rainy days. In other words, I'll never be completely free of it. But I'll be able to move on and have a good life.
In the meantime, I'm heading out of here for a few days. All of you take care - have a good weekend (I know how hard they can be). I'll be back next week.
Thanks again. You guys are the best!
Peace
GB2
Yeah, life will be a struggle for me for quite some time. Although MM and I live far apart, we had so much in common that there are many, many things that remind me of him. I know things are tough for you right now too. Guess we both need to take it one day at a time and see what happens. Stay strong, OK? Take care of yourself and I'll catch up with you next week.
Peace
GB2
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