I feel no guilt but that is only because of my relationship with my H, which isn't much of a relationship....so I'm the wrong one to ask...but you'll find many others here that have no guilt either.....so maybe it is normal.
I agree w/ scu. I think that the majority of post that I have read don't feel guilt. When I was M I didn't. But now I do feel a little guilty when it comes to his W, but that's more because of her unconditional acceptance of AP's and my "love child." She treats him as her own, and shops for him constantly. I have the up most respect for her, but it's not enough to make me stay away.
Oh OK, now I get it. Perhaps you felt guilty w/ the online stuff because it was the beginning of the R, and your, and AP's deception of others. In the beginning you felt guilty because you knew what you were doing was wrong, but w/ the passage of time you kind of built up a tolerance to feeling guilty until it no longer bothered you. Now that you have been exposed to the R, and all that it entails you have been in it long enough that you have learned how to shut the guilt out w/o realizing it. I guess it's like working in a hospital. At first you feel squeamish at the sight of blood, but after a while you get use to it until it's no longer an issue for you. I don't know for sure, I just thought that I would take a stab at it.
I don't know what's normal and what's not. Can speak only for myself. I've never felt guilty about A's. And this is not new for me. Thinking back, no matter what kind of R I'm in, I've always been drawn to others. And I never resisted very hard. :) I feel guilt about other things. Like if I forget someone's birthday. But not about the A's. It's just me, I guess.
LOL !! Me too, I feel more guilty cheating on my diet than on SO !!
Lately I have been wondering why. I mean, I've been on the other side of the table at least twice. My XH cheated, my XSO cheated. I've been a BS FGS. And did I suffer and harbour some serious hatred against the OWs !!
That's why I find it so strange that I don't feel guilt at all, by cheating on my SO with a MM. I can't for the life of me feel sorry for his W. I've tried and I'm reading the BS board all the time (yes I know it's sick, but I guess it's a way to try to find a reason to get out of this A when I hit the bottom of the rollercoaster from time to time). I read about their pain and their suffering, which I recognise and know all about, because I've BTDT. But sorry, no guilt !
No guilt here either. Just assumed it was because I am completely numb as far as my M is concerned. Nice to know there are others who don't feel guilty either.
Edited 2/21/2009 4:55 am ET by goblinqueen79
I don't know what's normal and what's not. Can speak only for myself. I've never felt guilty about A's. And this is not new for me. Thinking back, no matter what kind of R I'm in, I've always been drawn to others. And I never resisted very hard. :) I feel guilt about other things. Like if I forget someone's birthday. But not about the A's. It's just me, I guess.
jana
LOL !! Me too, I feel more guilty cheating on my diet than on SO !!
Lately I have been wondering why. I mean, I've been on the other side of the table at least twice. My XH cheated, my XSO cheated. I've been a BS FGS. And did I suffer and harbour some serious hatred against the OWs !!
That's why I find it so strange that I don't feel guilt at all, by cheating on my SO with a MM. I can't for the life of me feel sorry for his W. I've tried and I'm reading the BS board all the time (yes I know it's sick, but I guess it's a way to try to find a reason to get out of this A when I hit the bottom of the rollercoaster from time to time). I read about their pain and their suffering, which I recognise and know all about, because I've BTDT. But sorry, no guilt !
So I'd say it's normal.....
Edited 2/21/2009 4:55 am ET by goblinqueen79