Is it ok to give his kid a gift?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2008
Is it ok to give his kid a gift?
6
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 8:20pm

I'm M w/o kids and my AP is single with 1 (4yrs old). We have a LDA (400miles) and he says he will be in my area almost every week the months of Nov and Dec for the holidays. Yippee! (His parents live out here..they are very close and his mom is having surgery. ) The only reason that is keeping him from moving back to LA is his son. Anyways..my AP has said that he would like me to meet his son. Would it be appropriate to bring him a gift the first time I meet him? If its ok..what kind of gift would be appropriate?


thanks for your input.

FrustratedinOC
FrustratedinOC
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2006
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 8:52pm
In theory, I am opposed to someone of the oposite sex meeting a person's kid until and or unless they are getting serious.But , why not buy the kid something he sees and likes while you are spending time together? That way you'd know what he'd like. I'd also worry about what he might tell his mom about you.......
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 10:47pm

AP's parents live by you???

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2008
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 9:25am
I have always felt weird about giving gifts. I have bought cards in the past for bdays but never gave them to him. Didn't know how he would take it. I guess they are all different. I have OM in life also who I know would love a gift....however old AP no way. Just depends.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2008
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 11:31am
Thank you all for the advice and I think you are all right. I decided to just stay clear of any gift giving. Better to be safe than sorry.
FrustratedinOC
FrustratedinOC
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 12:16pm

i don't see anything wrong with it..my ap is m with 2 kids, one with W and one with another woman 21 years ago..he gives my son money, gifts, food, goes to his games, practices, advice and etc..i think it's harmless if it's just a toy or a gift a small child would like...if the child was a little older and he was a single dad that had custody, and the child was completely vulnerable to wanting a mommy in his life and you guys weren't serious, or you weren't willing to make a committment to the kid, although you're married i'd day heck naw(that was a mouthful..sorry i get wordy and can ramble)


..but the kid is 1, and he won't know the difference right now..he'll just appreciate that you gave him a gift....get me....go for what you know..i think they like elmo and diego from dora and fisher price little people at that age..i have a 1 year old nephew......(don't really know about the youngins my youngin is darned near a grown man)

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2006
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 3:22pm
wise choice. Never drag kids into an A. And giving a gift involves the child in your A