It's Officially Over - Update from D-day
Find a Conversation
| Thu, 08-12-2010 - 9:16am |
Sunday night is when it all went down and I had posted on here Monday about D-day disaster and wife hacking into his email and then blowing up my phone for details, he at first cursing me then changing his tune to apologizing. Monday afternoon he was texting me sorry over and over saying he would not be alone forever, no one wanted him, not even me. I told him I would never bother him again and he was upset at me for that. Idiot!! He just got caught. Ugh. My pain starts!
Fast forward to Tuesday and she sends me more texts, I keep denying, denying, denying. He told me to say nothing happened and for him, I did. W even sent me the emails from me talking about how good the sex was and emails from him to me saying see you in a few...and she still believes nothing happened. She told me "thank you for having a good heart and telling the truth" WHATEVER! WHAT A FOOL! Anyway, I should never have responded to her but after about 20 calls and 20 texts, I corresponded with nothing happened, stay with him, I am a nobody. So now my pain starts growing and my anger is raging. Our daily contact which was a ton and his sweet stuff said to me, the great sex, everything went cold turkey NC, screeching hault. Today is day 2 of NC and honestly, I am a friggin mess, had a panic attack last night, been crying when I am driving my myself, screaming at the top of my lungs, I see reminders of him everywhere I go, all these memories stuck in my mind, wondering if he is thinking about me at all, what is he doing, is he okay, etc.. I am looking for some sanity somewhere and trying to focus on myself and my boys, figure out who I am again - so far Im not doing very well. I deleted the emails he always contacted me via but can't block his # because of the extra mthly fee my husband would see on the bill. However, I honestly don't think I will ever hear from him again yet I would love some sort of closure. Something, anything. Sucks! Painful! Feeling a bit stupid and used for opening up so much and investing so much energy on him. As I wrote on EAS today, I am going to make a list of the things we didn't have in common and I hated about him. Maybe that will help.

Hi Confused,
I think it is great you are reading on EAS.