its such a good feeling when
Find a Conversation
its such a good feeling when
| Thu, 01-15-2009 - 7:55pm |
Your ap or xap just really wants to spend time with you. Today he took me out to lunch. We talked and had a really nice time. He also let me drive his car.we enjoyed each others company.

Pages
It's good that you at least recognize that he is really not your "ex" AP. The only way he is truly an ex is if you no longer harbor the thought that you could be with him, that you no longer feel the need to contact him, that you have very clear and distinct boundaries where he is concerned. Obviously you are nowhere near that at this time, and that's ok. Hopefully, you will get there eventually unless there truly is a chance you two will be together down the road. Otherwise, you may just be torturing yourself by continuing this pseudo-friendship, whether you are really conscious of that or not. What feels good right now, hanging out etc., may just come crashing down on you when (if) the day comes when you really, truly realize that it's never going to be a happily-ever-after with him.
On the other hand, if you really, truly can be satisfied with just being his friend...no illusions that it is now or will ever be anything more, than I'm happy for you. Just be careful you're not kidding yourself.
As long as it's not hurting you, I see nothing wrong with it.
My AP means enough to me that a few weeks ago when he started questioning this I would have gladly taken it back down to friends.
Tori, I started lurking here just before you and your AP broke up. I want to say that it may be a good thing to be just friends. I started off friends with my AP but I think we jumped to a PA too fast. I ended it for a bit, and we got together as friends for awhile. We really got to know each other without the sex. We spent a lot of time talking and slowly we got back to the PA. I have to say it is so much more worth it. We connect now on all aspects.
Good luck
Pages