June 1

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
June 1
20
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:38am
I'm will not be over my MM but I am done. Seriously.

I have become someone I do not like. And it's time to change....

Please pray and help support me in my efforts.

You are all great !!!!

v.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:42am
good luck - do what is best for you - listen to your gut. ((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))

db
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:45am
For once I am listening to my gut- not my heart.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2004
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:53am
V-

Over and over, we begin again.

--Banana Yoshimoto

Yesterday was such a difficult day. But here it is, morning again somehow. I've gotten through another twenty-four hours, and without OM/MM. I wish I'd known yesterday that things wouldn't feel so bad this morning.

-----

Yesterday, we did the best that we could. Yesterday is over. We have slept. We think we know some of what today will hold.

Let's take some deep, slow breaths and begin the day with faith that whatever it brings, we'll be present for it.

ox, JEN

(Hazelden Meditations)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2003
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:56am
(((vles)))) Hugs to you. We will still be here to talk to!! Wish you good luck and sending prayers your way. Hope it works out for you..

Chris

Gina
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:57am
beautiful jen!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 11:05am
Simply Beautiful. It made me cry- which to be honest with you- feels good. I am finally letting myself go...

I have printed this and stuck it to my pc and in my purse. It will hopefully be yet another thing that gives me the strength to overcome.

Thank you so much.

V.





Edited 5/27/2004 11:08 am ET ET by vles64

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2004
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 11:18am
God will never give us more than we can handle V! No one of us is "always" courageous. Fear is taken away each time we rely on our inner strength and trust that our lives are in good hands.

Your courage can come through your prayers, and the strength that has been given to you!

Good luck girl!

jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 11:35am
vles - good luck to you. it sounds like you are doing the right thing. i'm glad you are feeling ok so far. just be prepared - feelings can sneak up on you when you least expect them.

jen - thanks for your words of wisdom. i'm just two weeks post-A and i'm really struggling. neither XMM or I really wanted things to end, but because of his W and because XMM wanted to do the right thing and give his M one more try, we knew it was the right thing to do. doesn't stop it from hurting though. i needed the reminder that we aren't given more than we can handle. thanks again.

peace

gb2

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 12:22pm
Don't get me wrong... I still want my MM evn though he jerks me around.

But I want my self-esteem and a new sense of 'self' more...

Yes, I know there will be hard times, but there's nothing I can do about that but muddle through them...

You are all awesome.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 12:39pm
Hi Vles64, and my support is with you. I am like you, I would like to see MM but am sick of the way I am being treated. Its been almost 8 weeks since I last saw him. It has been since Monday this week I talked to him once then, before that it was NC for 4 weeks, his choice. He's afraid of being caught so he's cut me off completely it seems.

But you know what? I've been thru NC a few times with him, the longest time before was 8 weeks. And it has hardened my heart. When he called me Monday, he wanted me to just "jump" when he said jump. After not hearing from him for 4 weeks at all, he gets ahold of me and wants me to come and meet him. Well, I told him I couldn't, I had things to do and couldn't get away. I think that ticked him off somewhat, but tough for him.

He's been treating me like crap, why should I just run out and see him when he decides he wants to see me again?

Anyways, he can go straight to hell as far as I'm concerned. If I'm going to see him again, it will be on my terms. And if I don't feel like it, I won't go.

So far anyways, he's put me on NC again since Monday. So maybe his guilty feelings are getting in the way again. Or he angry at me for not coming out to meet him on Monday. He said he's erased all the pic's of us together. Guess that tells it all. Take care and you are not alone!! You will make it.

Dusty
xxxx

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