June 1
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June 1
| Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:38am |
I'm will not be over my MM but I am done. Seriously.
I have become someone I do not like. And it's time to change....
Please pray and help support me in my efforts.
You are all great !!!!
v.

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Over and over, we begin again.
--Banana Yoshimoto
Yesterday was such a difficult day. But here it is, morning again somehow. I've gotten through another twenty-four hours, and without OM/MM. I wish I'd known yesterday that things wouldn't feel so bad this morning.
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Yesterday, we did the best that we could. Yesterday is over. We have slept. We think we know some of what today will hold.
Let's take some deep, slow breaths and begin the day with faith that whatever it brings, we'll be present for it.
ox, JEN
(Hazelden Meditations)
Chris
I have printed this and stuck it to my pc and in my purse. It will hopefully be yet another thing that gives me the strength to overcome.
Thank you so much.
V.
Edited 5/27/2004 11:08 am ET ET by vles64
Your courage can come through your prayers, and the strength that has been given to you!
Good luck girl!
jen
jen - thanks for your words of wisdom. i'm just two weeks post-A and i'm really struggling. neither XMM or I really wanted things to end, but because of his W and because XMM wanted to do the right thing and give his M one more try, we knew it was the right thing to do. doesn't stop it from hurting though. i needed the reminder that we aren't given more than we can handle. thanks again.
peace
gb2
But I want my self-esteem and a new sense of 'self' more...
Yes, I know there will be hard times, but there's nothing I can do about that but muddle through them...
You are all awesome.
But you know what? I've been thru NC a few times with him, the longest time before was 8 weeks. And it has hardened my heart. When he called me Monday, he wanted me to just "jump" when he said jump. After not hearing from him for 4 weeks at all, he gets ahold of me and wants me to come and meet him. Well, I told him I couldn't, I had things to do and couldn't get away. I think that ticked him off somewhat, but tough for him.
He's been treating me like crap, why should I just run out and see him when he decides he wants to see me again?
Anyways, he can go straight to hell as far as I'm concerned. If I'm going to see him again, it will be on my terms. And if I don't feel like it, I won't go.
So far anyways, he's put me on NC again since Monday. So maybe his guilty feelings are getting in the way again. Or he angry at me for not coming out to meet him on Monday. He said he's erased all the pic's of us together. Guess that tells it all. Take care and you are not alone!! You will make it.
Dusty
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