just a question... sexual tension?

Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
just a question... sexual tension?
19
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:12pm
Do you think sexual tension is something that can be all in someone's head, or do you think if you are in a situtation where there's a man and woman, and you are feeling it, he must be feeling it too?

Does that make sense?

i am not asking this in regards to a guy i like or my A or anything, i was just in a room alone with a guy, and there seemed to be some sexual tenstion, and i was wondering, coud i be making it up LOL!!!!

Just something to think about!

jen

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:19pm
Sexual tension can exist between any two people who are single or in non-satisfying relationships and who find each other very attractive and are thrown in close physical proximity.


PG

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:22pm

hey jenn -- of course there's sexual tension when a man and woman are attracted to each other.

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board

Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:23pm
OK, i guess i agree, but my question was in regards to the opposite.... two people who don't really know squat about each other but for some reason are alone in close proximity.

Actually, i am not sure i agree with the unsatisfying relationship part. i think it's damn fun to flirt, and it has little to do with the kind of relationship i am in.

Anyway, that's what i meant in my regards to the question... two people who really don't know each other. i was afriad i woudn't be able to word it well... like not flirting, but just a feelign in the air.

Alright, i give up LOL

jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:37pm
Jenny

I think if all of ones needs (emotional and physical) are satisfied, one has less of an urge to act on an attraction. With guys, you keep em totally drained, fed and appreciated ...they wouldn't feel the tension with another person. Women are a little more complicated but again if the guy f*cks you proper (LOL), is a fantastic provider, is affectionate and you hold him in high regard you would probably appreciate the good looks of another guy (just like you would that of a woman's) but not actively flirt.

PG

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:40pm
oh my! what a mouth you have esp for a girl whose marriage has been arranged. Oh btw, would you mind telling me how you met your H? I am fascinated with arranged marriages!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 12:50pm
Juliet,

I and H were both in college when our parents (who were friends) got us engaged. I was 19, hubby was 21. We married 3 years later. I was the mature type from the beginning and although realized that my hubby was not all that I was looking for but fell in love with him since he was mine. Hubby has always been in love with me but was a little immature and was a late bloomer as far as taking financial responsibilites and prioritizing his and our life was concerned. Once I realized that he didn't take life seriously, I thought I had a licence to form outside crushes. Now he is all what a guy should be (minus the emotional support that he sometimes fails to provide) but now I feel that I am not in love. I am working on my feelings towards another married guy. Reading about midlife gives me hope.

PG

PS: Whats your story?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 1:12pm
Oh, I don't have a story.

Why does midlife give you hope? Isn't giving up your emotions and wants for destiny, part of an arranged marriage's premise based on? Why would you need a mid life crisis help you with anything? Also why should a person who been married to somebody that they did not choose not have another chance at love and happiness. Some food for thought.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2004
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 3:30pm
PG,

Well said! I don't think I would feel such an attraction toward someone I work with if my husband and I didn't have problems in several areas.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 3:38pm
I have felt that before, although I don't get the same vibes these days. Funny, I have never felt that cracking sexual tension except with the OM, but there have been a few times before we met. I don't think it relates to the type of relationship you are in - its just in the air - so as to speak and it dissapears after a while... lol Hope I made some sense. Hard to describe something as abstract as this...
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2003
Tue, 02-24-2004 - 7:35pm
You start off well with "all of ones needs (emotional and physical) are satisfied", then procede to say things that make men and women satisfied in a way that makes me cringe. I can think of wonderful ways two partners can be happy in an marriage - like respect, love, companionship and passion. I don't see any of them here. Anyway you oversimplify needs and expectations way too much methinks.

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