Kind of confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2010
Kind of confused
5
Fri, 08-20-2010 - 3:00am
I was talking to a friend who knows that I am having an affair on my H and she told me that I don't love my husband. She said if I did love him I wouldn't be having an affair is she right?? I love my husband very much I just love the other guy too. I am confused because I know I love him but she thinks I don't. I have thought about leaving my H because I am cheating but I can't imagine my life without him. I also can't imagine my life without my other guy. They both mean the world to me. I only have a couple weeks left with my other guy my husband is going to be home at night which means no more sex or cuddling my other guy. I am really stressed out about this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2008
Fri, 08-20-2010 - 7:28am

(((hugs)))

You should take the A for what it is. Lot of them are very short. Yes, you can love them both. That happened with an A I had years ago, but we had a bad ugly Dday. Since then I have worked to keep emotions in check with AP. I have 2 and I like them, they are fun (in different ways) and they are good to me, but I don't love them. I do love my H even when I am po'd at him which is a lot of the time, lol. Sorry this probably isn't helpful but yes, I can see being in love with both H and AP.

-jana

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2010
Fri, 08-20-2010 - 10:16am
Isnt your AP your BIL? Leave this mess and you will be better off as this can get very dirty and messy.Is he your sisters H or H's brother?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2010
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 1:44am
He is my h brother. I know I have gotten myself into a really big mess and I know it shoudl never have happened but it did and I love him so very much. My screw up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 11:50am

I think that if you feel love for your H in your heart, then you do love him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2010
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 3:23pm
Thank you for the help. I do love both men. If I could I would leave my husband for ap I am no longer in love with my h instead I am in love with ap. Last night I was cuddling AP and I told him that I wished I could be with him and he said he knows. I feel like I am being pulled in two different directions. If I left my h right now he would fall apart he loves me so very much. But I want to feel that wonderful feeling I get with AP. AP has told me that we will never be able to be together because of him being brothers with my h. I just wish they weren't brothers because I would have left my h a long time ago.