lilnow...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
lilnow...
2
Thu, 09-18-2003 - 9:00am
Your situation does sound a lot like mine. We were both teenagers when we first got involved. He was a little older, so when he went off to college I guess he wanted to sow his wild oates and that was the root of most of our problems. The other was that I was very sheltered and my mother never liked him so the only way we could see each other was to sneak around. So, he began dating a college girl and I dated other guys yet we continued to see each other. After I graduated high school I moved away and we lost contact. Then, through my mother of all people, he obtained my address and wrote me a letter (and he hates to write). We began mail correspondence and I moved back to be with him. Got back and it was the same old story. Then he met his wife and I moved to another city with someone else. We talked on the phone occasionally and one night he announced that he was going to propose to her and hinted that maybe I could stop him. I told him in so many words that I didn't care (but I did). He mentioned that he would like to continue seeing me but I declined. They got married and moved out of state.

Fast forward. I left the guy I was living with and got in touch with MM again. We had our first affair just short of his one year anniversary. We saw each other at least twice a year for about three years after that. Then I met my husband and had my children and never contacted him until recently when I couldn't get him off my mind. The conversation started innocently enough, but before long we were talking about the old days and he was asking what happened to us and if we could find a way to be together for the rest of our lives (so hard to hear from him because I wonder the same thing but know that we are in a rather tough situation). Before I knew it we were planning to get together in a couple of months.

So, that's my sordid tale. Complicated ain't it, LOL!

T.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
In reply to: can_i_be_me
Thu, 09-18-2003 - 9:37am
Your situation sounds no more complicated than mine. Things do tend to get complicated if you break up, date other people, get back together, etc. I understand.

My advice to you would be to RELAX. Take it from some one who has been there. The first time you see him, all of the years of NC will be wiped away.

Please email me. This is scary to find someone whose posts seem like I could have written them myself.





Edited 9/18/2003 2:16:25 PM ET by lilnow

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
In reply to: can_i_be_me
Thu, 09-18-2003 - 12:34pm
ok, i'm going to email you right now.