Local Affairs - More Emotional Risk?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
Local Affairs - More Emotional Risk?
6
Wed, 03-25-2009 - 9:13am

Hi All,


New to the board here.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2008
Wed, 03-25-2009 - 9:51am
I can you from my own personal experience to say it will only remain sex and no emotions, you are fooling your self. Emotions seem to pop u sooner or later. In 2 years my affair went from sex and lunches to no sex and very emotional.now i fell in love. I miss him, i hurt, i did not think we would bond like we have.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Wed, 03-25-2009 - 12:56pm

Yes, there's definitely more of a danger of falling in love when the person is close and you see each other a lot.

Much of it is chemical. See the thread called "Chemistry 101" somewhere down below to get an explanation of that. In short form - your body makes "bonding" chemicals when you have good sex. They are the very same chemicals your body makes when you breastfeed. Nature has motivation to keep us pair bonded while our children are born, and then to make us bonded to our infants, or they wouldn't survive. If you see someone often and have good sex, you run a huge risk of becoming extremely emotionally attached. Men don't make the same chemicals, I don't believe. They can fall in love and there might be some chemical reaction with them also but I don't think it's as strong. I also did read somewhere that after menopause a woman doesn't make those chemicals anymore (or not as much) and can have great sex and NOT fall in love, like men always seem able to do...

So, just be prepared for it!

Some would say that I fell from grace... but I didn't.

Proud to be a



You've got a lot of choices. I
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Wed, 03-25-2009 - 1:37pm

Hi Lexi :)


Just wanted to hijack for one little moment to say that I read, I think in


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Wed, 03-25-2009 - 8:56pm

Continuing the hijack :-)

Clarity I also read that sex will continue to be "bonding" to a post menopausal woman in a LOVING relationship. It just isn't as "chemically induced" as it once was - but it's not just chemicals that makes sex "bonding". What post menopausal women can do more easily than younger women, however, is enter into a "sex only" relationship, have great sex, and NOT be chemically induced into falling in love. Not that they can't fall in love - but it's based on more than chemicals or good sex at that point. :)

Some would say that I fell from grace... but I didn't.

Proud to be a



You've got a lot of choices. I
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2008
Thu, 03-26-2009 - 10:38pm
I think it depends. I have been in
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2008
Fri, 03-27-2009 - 4:30am

hi just to put my two cents in, i started my menopause at 36, and i still have a extreme high sex drive. Having said this i connected with my ap on all levels before it became a physical affair. My ap brings out emotions in me ive never experienced with any other. Just one touch from him or look and i can feel the damn sex chemicals kicking in lol (even though im not supposed to have any). But then again is it the love that i feel for him that drives that rather than the MIA chemicals. I dont take any hormone replacements so cant be that! As for my H and I i feel nothing, no emotions, no

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