Longest period of time with n/c

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2003
Longest period of time with n/c
11
Sat, 11-22-2003 - 8:53am
As some of you might know by my last post about ending the A.

This relationship is clearly very different then anything else we have experienced, and I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that the guidelines/rules are very different as well.

After a good nights sleep and wonderful supportive information here, I need to remember he wasn't feeling well, was under pressure to get a large project done and getting ready for a trip to visit family for Thanksgiving. Having said that, I DO need to relax and wait for him to contact me.

How long have some of you gone with n/c from your MM/OM?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2003
Sat, 11-22-2003 - 11:03am


Hi there hon,


11 days today.... he last said he would try to come over this( yesterday)

friday night... I was fed up with this and left him a voicemail....I guess this

going to be a trend now, give me the courtesy of a phone call if you are not coming

so I can make other plans... then calling the next day to say sorry I was terse,

this just hurts me when you do this..... NO call back, no Friday night date,.....

so aggravated by this.... You are right the circumstances of these A s are different but

does there need to be games and hurtful behavior.

He said when we last saw each other, that he feels guilty for not calling...

and my finding a bf would be better for me and less painful... I said then why do you do it.... he says well, I guess that's easier than saying we can't see each other any more...

don't you think??? I just said I didn't know... b/c he was f...ing with me.

so sick of his crap. Last time it was four weeks and of course I called him like an idiot!!!

He too is getting ready for a trip for the Thanksgiving Holiday.... wanted to see him before he left.

somebody just shoot me.

Deb

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2003
Sat, 11-22-2003 - 6:10pm

Well..it wasn't an A completely...we decided to go NC in June of last year because if we continued in the direction it was going, we would have crossed the line. Now I'm wishing we would have continued because the what-if's are killing me. My SG is an old boyfriend and was actually the OM in many relationships I've had in my life, except my marriage. I lost contact with SG 1 yr before I met my husband. And then like I said, we went NC again because the feelings were so strong. But I contacted him again last wed and i finally heard from him today. we'll see where it goes from there.


Haunted

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2003
Sat, 11-22-2003 - 11:07pm
Hi life

Longest for me was five days...and WAS I PISSED (can I say that?!) I'm actually annoyed with him right now -- haven't heard from him in a couple of days (why I'm on here)!

Charlotte

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2003
Sun, 11-23-2003 - 1:53pm



I'm sure this is the beginning of the end for me, and I am not happy...

meaning there is more pain than joy so it will eventually feel better,

but today I didn't want to get out of bed ........ just depressed by

it all....sick of men in general, had a great date last weekend than

nothing, no call or anything........makes no sense to me any of it.

I swear i'd like to leave a boiled bunny on his porch, I am so mad!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 12:48pm
well, life, you do sound lots better in this thread! good for you honey. i know they say "patience is a virtue", but it's very hard to put into practice!

to answer your question -- only a day or two of NC with my MM. we are in phone contact every day, sometimes 2 or 3 times a day, and see each other at least once a week, although i'm seeing him today AND tomorrow, so woohoo for me!! he and W are going away for the holiday and back on saturday, so we're getting our time in when we can!

hang in there and keep your chin up!

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 1:32pm
We only realized our love on July 29. We have seen each other 3 times since then. August 20, 21, October 3 and October 26. We talk on the phone long distance about 5 times a week. The distance between us (over 200 miles with a large metropolitan area in between) makes it impossible to see each other more often, and it drives me crazy.

Those of you who see each other every day are so lucky! I often worry that just the logistics of this will mean the end, since I don't see our love for each other ending. We are both married, too, he with a teenager at home-I'm an empty nester.

Legs

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 1:46pm
The longest time for us was one whole year without any contact. I don't know if I will be strong enough to redo if it was needed/required. It was most sadest year in my life - it felt like somebody had taken away a part of me. I was like a dead woman walking. I definitely don't want a repeat of that, ever.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 5:00pm
Thanks for your support, gurl. I'm trying to keep in mind he was sick, had to get this huge project done, get ready for this trip. He's in Europe visiting family, so between the time difference, the fact he is probably never alone makes contacting me tricky to say the least. He will be back Friday. Hopefully I will hear from him by Monday.

I hope this gets easier, or I get use to it!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2003
Wed, 11-26-2003 - 1:50pm
going on 6 weeks. we have had longer periods of nc, but that was when we ended it. this time he just moved and never contacted except for two short instant messages saying he loved me and was busy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2003
Wed, 11-26-2003 - 4:20pm
what does n/c mean or o/m thanks

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