Losing all self-respect...

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Losing all self-respect...
12
Tue, 01-27-2009 - 10:30pm

Okay, so here I go again on this merry-go-round of emotions.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2008
Tue, 01-27-2009 - 10:54pm
Oh Miss... I don't know what advice I can tell you but I am in the same boat as you, however, my AP is the worst of its bunch....pathological liar.

Angelinajolie.jpg Angelina Jolie image by looie31007st


young.jpg Young luv image by submarinerforever

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 1:01am

Hi miss,


If we truly love someone and they love us back as well, would we let the other lose self respect?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2009
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 2:31am

Come on G2, cut the girl some slack, she is hurting.

I remember onetime when I was a little girl, and my mom said not to play in the street. Of course I did it anyway. I knew it was wrong, but the street had a certain allure to it. It was like it was tempting me to come and play. So, I took the chance, and went into the street. I saw my mom looking outside, so tried to hurry up and get out of the street, and I fell, and had broken my arm in three places.

Well, needless to say I was screaming in pain laying in the street. Do you know what my mother did when she realized that I had been in the street despite the fact that she implicitly told me not to go? She scooped up her broken child, and kissed me on the forehead, and said "Don't worry Honey, it WILL be alright."

She no longer cared if what I did was right or wrong, all that she cared about was the fact that I was hurt, and I needed her care.

Well, G2 this is the same challenge that I give to you. Forget how she got here or why she came here, because here is where she is right now, and she needs our care. I say that we extend our hands in friendship, and love to help her get herself together. Let us be the last to judge, and the first to render aid.

Justice

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2008
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 8:39am
Nice post, Justice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2009
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 2:07pm
Thank you. I'm glad that my message came through. I feel the same about the support thing too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2009
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 2:15pm

I too enjoy reading your posts. You have a way of getting your point across and offer support at the same time.

OP, please don't be so hard on yourself. We are all on this board for the same reason, affairs. All of us could say the same things about ourselves. I get what your saying, just realize that you are not alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2006
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 6:47pm
It is so easy to get so caught up in an affair with a man that we love that we do things we aren't proud of and we can lose our self respect.....point is this person realizes that she's losing it, so atleast she has that awareness......that is the first step and what may help her to move on.....
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 01-28-2009 - 9:53pm

Thank you for your words of support and encouragement.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Thu, 01-29-2009 - 9:08am

I don't know if you had a chance to read G2's post before it was deleted, but I hope you did.


I know it was harsh - but her message was right on point - in my opinion.


There are some wonderful women on here who take the softer approach - and then equally wonderful women who just aren't as delicate - I'm probably closer to the non-delicate side with G2.


You pretty much repeated what she said - that you're going to need to hit rock bottom before you work your way out of this mess.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2005
Thu, 01-29-2009 - 9:24am

thank you for that post, Justice

we are not therapists - but we are not clairvoyants either. it is hard to give advice when all you can see are the black and white words of one person in the relationship. so maybe sometimes they don't need our advice as much as they need our concern.

Miss, i wish you good luck in finding a therapist. a good therapist. be assured, he or she will not judge you or be harsh with you - but he/she will try to understand what motivates you to make the choices you do. your awareness that the choice is bad is step 1. understanding how you got there is step 2. changing it is step 3 and sticking to it is step 4.

LOL someone else prolly has the 12 step approach down but 4 steps is enough for me.

Mrs.

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