married co-worker
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married co-worker
| Fri, 09-26-2003 - 10:16pm |
A married man I work with flirts with me ALOT. We are both professionals in our thirties. He likes to bump against me, wink, tell me how good I look, give that "look" up and down. He's "joked" about having a date with me (a group of us was going out after work. I invited him and he acted excited and said, jokingly, "are we going out on a date?") Is he testing the waters? The problem is I really like him and I know it would probably be crazy to get involved with him. I've done it before. (He left his wife, but also left me). Anyway, this has been going on for a couple of years and the flirting is getting more intense (from both me and him). We've always had an awesome working relationship and the chemistry between us is getting instense. Do you think he is trying to start something or is he just flirting?

I have been in an EMA for almost 3 years with a married co-worker. Your situation sure sounds familiar to me! My MM was not quite so obvious, but the feelings/chemistry were there. We also danced around beginning our EMA for 2 years prior to even touching each other. I think that he is sending out signals that he is willing. Since you have been in an EMA before, I am sure you know all of the emotions involved. Only you can know if you are ready to deal with the roller coaster again. I have fallen so deeply in love with my MM that I can not imagine life without him. Unfortunately, someday I will have to. It is an intense, but not easy, love affair.
Good luck and we are here if you need us!
Hugs
RH
Do you really WANT to get involved in another EMA!?? Didn't it tear you apart last time?
My prayers are with you...
still lost
Well, the last time I was in an EMA, it wasn't an EMA for very long. I knew he was having marital problems and was wanting out. I thought we had a good chance. I was fairly certain he would leave his wife. He did leave his wife. 2 months later I found out he was also seeing another woman, not just me! Seemed I was seeing one of those men addicted to women. The signs were there, but I ignored them. He was very good-looking and quite a flirt. So it wasn't the EMA that tore me apart, it was afterwards!
This guy is different. Not very good-looking. Not ugly, just not what you would call attractive. I wasn't even attracted to him until I got to know him. I've discovered we have strong chemistry. I'm VERY attracted to him now. I don't know what his marriage is like. I think the potential for heartbreak is stronger here, because my attraction isn't as much based on lust and not knowing what his homelife is like, well, let's just say, I know what the EMA statistics MM leaving their wives. Not that I'm thinking about that now, but I realize that if I start a relationship with him, I might fall in love. And it's torture to continue as it is. I'm getting to the point where I'm not even interested in dating other men. I'm considering making a move and seeing where it goes.
I wish I could keep MM while I'm looking for someone else...but obviously that isn't a good idea (for many reasons). Besides, how will I ever attract a 'healthy' man if I'm practicing unhealthy behavior:(
If my MM left his wife, I know he'd be all over anybody he could get (and he could get anybody) He married young to his HS sweetheart.....13 years later he's out on the prowl for a little fun. I just happened to be the lucky lady;) We were each other's toy. But you know what? I'd probably do it again...he was just to yummy to pass up!!!
Maybe a move/change will be a good thing??????