Married men love me, single men repelled

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2009
Married men love me, single men repelled
11
Sat, 07-18-2009 - 12:15am

I'm not looking for advice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Sat, 07-18-2009 - 12:48am

i think the term you may be looking for is concubine...


i have the same problem....married men


men are simply little boys who throw temper tantrums


and have to be competetive...you know that locker room


talk stuff and the my dad can beat your dad thing


well, i have come to believe that men tell their stories


and so the other guy has to try to beat it, you know the


story. hey, joe in finance says he is banging the newly divorced


hr gal...he seems to be having fun and tells me all about his


sexual exploits...i can do better than that...and so it goes..


ignore them and they will go away. don't reward them for


their tantrums...


either that or married men are not ashamed to grovel where


as the single guys, well, married men are used to rejection, lol, so it can't


hurt to ask, huh...


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Sat, 07-18-2009 - 9:06am

If you advertised somewhere for married men, why not make the same effort and advertise for a single man?? So what if you're "average", there are lots of lonely and available single guys out there. Maybe they're "average" too - are you willing to try to get to know them better and see what's on the inside?

I think, for some reason, you don't WANT to be in a real relationship right now, or you would be making the same effort to find one as you are making to find some sexual release.

This thing with the cult guy - it could ruin your life for the next few years, because it sounds like you're already getting emotional. Once you're infatuated with a married man, you won't be able to look at a single guy - no one will measure up. So there will be years wasted, pining for a married guy who will never leave his wife.

Think before you move. And then accept the consequences, eyes wide open, for whatever you move forward on.

Some would say that I fell from grace... but I didn't.

Proud to be a



You've got a lot of choices. I
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Sun, 07-19-2009 - 12:02am

i think it is important to remember that in most cases,


and i suppose that is a generalization, that it is the


mm who come on to the sw. i think that the op's


experience shows this as well. if a sw is open to a r


and the only options, or men who are interested are mm,


it creates a huge dilemma. as a sw open to a r, when a mm


expresses interest there is almost always the thought on


sw's part that there is obviously something wrong with


mm's home life or he wouldn't be looking. and generally,


a sw's thought process is that mm is looking for another r


to move on from a bad m. that may or may not be true.


more often than not, it is not going to work out that way.


sw need to be much more aware of that. is it better to get


head over heals involved with a mm and the almost inevitible


disaster to all involved or remain single

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2009
Sun, 07-19-2009 - 1:31pm

Ladies, thanks for your response and thoughts.


First of all, I have advertised for single men.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2008
Sun, 07-19-2009 - 5:26pm

Hi i_am_clear,


It looks to me that you have very low self-esteem.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Mon, 07-20-2009 - 2:10am

i'm with you on that - high sex drive, but also knowing that i


simply can't go into anything just for the sex. honestly speaking,


i would ravage xap in a hearbeat, the chemistry is just there.


however, i know i am worth more than that. yes, i pressured him


and always would, that i am not willing to sacrafice my emotions


for an occassional outrageous round of incredible sex. do i want it,


you bet, right now, let's go, lol...


however, here is my story. i have been celebate for 10 years.


yes, really, other than multitudes of toys...;0


so my xap and i were pa many years ago...went nc for many years


because i knew at that time i could not be his ap. it


is all or nothing. we met up again many years later, incredibly


hot, ea, phone sex, blah, blah, blah...but the same issue is still


there. he is still mwc - married w children. it is not the guilt


of

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Mon, 07-20-2009 - 11:31am

questions for prospective 'dates' -


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2007
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 9:06am

Here is a very good link for you to read to find self love and spiritual peace. You really need to realize that MM constantly coming on to you is not flattering; it is an indication that you are giving off signals which let them know that you are desperate and needy for attention and love. Find peace, because I promise you that when you can truly find your inner peace and love yourself totally you will realize that having a multitude of men in and out of your bed and your body robs you even further of your self love.


www.anicolt.com/SelfLove.html

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2009
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 2:19pm

I think you're looking for LOVE in all the wrong places and as you should already know by now, you're the one coming up empty. In my POV, MM find you perfect because they only get to use you for free and then can throw you back in the water when they're done. Show me a MM who doesn't want that? But, believe me, if these MM's W ever get a whiff of you, they'll be the first to shove you down under that bus.

SM on the other hand, want someone they can respect and take home to Mom & Pop. If they think you're a slut (your word) and too easy, they won't touch you with a ten foot pole.

My suggestion then would be. Find that love within yourself. You're the only one who can fill that void. Running around seducing and sleeping with MM are to me very destructive and you're playing a role in the devastation of innocent people's lives. That can't be good for your self esteem, self respect and peace of mind.

Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2009
Tue, 07-21-2009 - 9:58pm

Wow, OK, I figured if I could talk anywhere freely about where I was coming from, and without judgement, this would be the place.

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